Love Hurts!!!


Did you know love is not enough? I found that out in a sudden, dramatic way yesterday. I was travelling in our lockdown city of Melbourne to visit my supposed partner outside the 5-kilometre allowable zone when I rang her because she had written to me that she felt a bit down about her zoom visit to her psychologist. I rang her to find out what could I do for her, two hours later I was heading home and it was all over.

It was because I had agreed with her and allowed her space the night before and it seems I should not have listened to her and gone against her will and taken care of her. We had discussed this for an hour after I was halfway there and she told me she felt the most empowered she had ever felt. It seems that I am not enough to meet her needs. A day later I realise that I cannot be different from where I am at the moment. I can grow but cannot miraculously be different from where I am at the moment, so yes, Love hurts.

What does society say about the pain of unrequited love, lets have a look:

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1. I hope it finds this place soon.

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2. I forgot: Stronger.

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3. I found out the embrace of love is not enough.

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4. How will I get her out of my heart, it seems impossible at the moment, only time will tell: Love Hurts.

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5. Being in the same city doesn’t seem far enough, I cannot stop thinking of her.

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6. I’m crying typing this: When I Look at You.

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7. I wish you the best life.

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8. No words needed: Disappear.

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9. It’s storming in my heart.

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10. I mistakenly thought this was not us: Almost in Love.

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11. It seems this was not us.

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12. And not just of a sexual nature: Dreaming of You.

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13. I fear this.

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14. Thank you karma, you hurt: Instant Karma.

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15. and our final lesson comes from the Twitter personality Bauvard – A work of art should stand on its own, divorced from the personality of the creator. That is the only way the creator can be a work of art in himself.  

So what am I learning? Embrace that individual inside you who has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else. Be the person you know yourself to be – the best version of you – on your terms. And above all, be true to you – if you cannot put your heart into it, take yourself out of it. Starting today…

1. Get your priorities right.

2. Take full responsibilities for your goals.

3. Know your worth.

4. Choose the right perspective.

5. Don’t let your old problems punish your dreams

6. Choose the things that truly matter.

7. Love You.

8. Accept your strengths and Weaknesses.

9. Stand up for You.

10. Learn from others, and move on when you must.

11. Be honest in your relationships.

12. get comfortable with being UNcomfortable.

13. Be who you were born to be.

14. Never give up on You.

The playlist today is a bit maudlin, we begin with Kayne West, go back to the 1970s to hear that song by Nazareth. The four pop divas: Miley Cyrus, Beyonce, Olivia O’Brien and Selena. We finish off with John Lennon: Love Hurts!!!

This will not stop me from spreading the ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. I have extended it to a million people in my new tribe: Thriving People.

Join if you wish. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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What the Fuck is Intimacy, anyway?


I spent the day with the remarkable woman who has come into my life. In new relationships often the sexual side of it is what is most relevant, as the lust factor is high. The question I asked her before I went there last night was would she read me the bible, as she is a woman of faith. She agreed, and it didn’t happen as many other wonderful things did.

What is intimacy, anyway? Here is a shot at four different types:

  • Experiential Intimacy: When people bond during leisure activities. People may “sync up” their actions in teamwork or find themselves acting in unison.
    • Example: A father and son work together to build a model train, developing a rhythm to their teamwork.
  • Emotional Intimacy: When people feel safe sharing their feelings with each other, even uncomfortable ones.
    • Example: A woman confides in her sister about her body image issues. She trusts her sibling to offer comfort rather than using her insecurities against her.
  • Intellectual Intimacy: When people feel comfortable sharing ideas and opinions, even when they disagree.
    • Example: Two friends debate the meaning of life. They enjoy hearing each other’s opinions and don’t feel the need to “win” the argument.
  • Sexual Intimacy: When people engage in sensual or sexual activities. When people use the word “intimacy,” they are often referring to this type.
    • Example: Two lovers engage in foreplay, knowing how each other prefers to be touched.

So can you guess what we did? We did the dishes, set up a piece of furniture, discussed how we were feeling and why was, mainly me resisting being present to it, massaged each other, cleaned the stovetop and went for an hours walk. It was serene and magnificent in its intimacy.

How does the world relate to intimacy, lets walk down that road together:

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1. I met you six years ago. It was definitely worth the wait.

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2. When I reach this plateau, my body tingles all over: Soul Kind of Feeling.

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3. A writer of words, a poetic soul, an emotive expressionist, Ranata Suzuki is a poet and quote writer whose eloquent words form with painful clarity the sad yet beautiful world of the broken heart. An anonymous writer based in Sydney, Australia, Ranata is known only by her avatar of a bird carrying a book.

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4. How does the end of someone’s hair, become erotic. It’s easy in the land of intimacy: What Am I?

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5. I confess I have made those 3am texts.

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6. Especially now in lockdown in Melbourne, Australia we have to wear a mask when we leave the house: Bette Davis Eyes.

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7. When you get into this kind of intimacy sex feels redundant at times.

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8. Be weird with me, baby: Love is a Battlefield.

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9. We did this for part of our walk today.

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10. At times, I caught myself falling into hers when she looked back at me: Soul Man.

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11. And then there is the ultimate love, love of self.

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12.  I am actually feeling the I Love You’ in my heart, Yum: I Love You.

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13. And it takes work to achieve this state, AS Katie Byron says, time to do Te Work.

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14. Snap: Hurt.

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15. I took trust out of the picture, she told me to fuck off until I had got the cost of this in our relationship, lucky for me she has an awesome heart.

So I am on a journey of intimacy, perhaps for the first time truly in my 66-year-old life, it feels magnificent.

Today’s playlist begins with an Australian classic from the Dynamic Hepnotics, followed by Edie Bricknell and the New Bohemians. Two classic female rockers from last century are next, Kim Carnes and Pat Benetar. Sam and Dave then lay some funky R and B on us. We move back into the present with Billy Ellish and complete with the Man in Black, Johny Cash: What the Fuck is Intimacy, Anyway?

So the purpose of my ethos for the world: Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included is to have more intimacy available in the world. Until we meet again my dear friends.

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How Can You Mend A Broken Heart!!!


You may have noticed my past 5 blogs have been about growing friendship with my friend Amy. It moved quickly and then spectacularly into becoming lovers against all the reasons the world tells you that a friendship between two people 28 years apart in age should. Being used to a single life, where you domestic actions didn’t have a lot of repercussions to being in a partnership saw me totally do some things that have unfortunately taken it from you are the greatest lover I have ever had and talk about moving in together to stop treating me like I am your mother in a period just greater than 24 hours.

Did we really love each other, yes we did, but I allowed my actions to move our relationship from our hearts to her head. I sit here writing this close to tears and I have cried about ten times in my 66 years, my parents once sent me to a phycologist to see why I couldn’t during my teenage years, it didn’t resolve anything and I am still a non-crier basically. The only thing that shifted it was the joy I felt in my love for Amy, I would be sitting on a railway station and feel tears of joy welling up, very un Rod Williams like.

My relationship consultant friend who is also a phycologist advised that we should not contact each other for 30 days as to go from the passion of a ten to the lesser feelings of friendship, say a three to a five we had to journey through our grief and sadness at to what we had lost, as moments this sacred are rare in people’s lives. I fight with the urge daily to break this especially when Amy contacted me. I wanted to write platitudes how I would do anything to get back together, but this is the act of 17-year-old first love. I must admit after 12 years it did feel a bit like this for me.

I realise I could write 1,000s of words what this woman means to me, I will journal them later, so what has the world said about relationship breakdowns and broken hearts over the years. Let’s have a look:

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1. Oh, how I wished I could have stopped this occurring.

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2. Oh, how my heart yearns for this: How Can You Mend A Broken Heart.

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3. I love His Holiness quotes, but my heart does not want to agree with this one at all.

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4. Crossed fingers, but it fucking hurts so much at the moment: Don’t Judge Me.

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5. One of the things I did not do was break glass but forgetting to thank her most of the time was just as devastating.

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6. And to me, it is you: My Immortal.

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7. I am feeling this more and more as the pain slides away.

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8. I am not ready for Amy to do that yet, I may not be responsible for my reaction in the emotional state I am in at the present: Run Through The Jungle.

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9. This hurts in the I still love her zone.

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10. I was the storm: Riders On The Storm.

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11. I didn’t really do the second thing or did I, she has gone.

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12. I lost in the first round: Street Fighting Man.

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13. Ken oath.

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14. We talked about our families a lot: We are Family.

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15 And for our final lesson, well said Trent.

I spoke to a friend halfway through writing this for half an hour because I believe she has wisdom in this area. She advised me three things: 1. Take ownership for your part of the breakdown and look for the red flags that were there for it to happen. 2. Make agreements, keep them. If you are going to break them, communicate, communicate, communicate. 3. Take time to heal before you think about going back there, and do this day by day.

I am just doing these things now.

The playlist today is funk and rock and roll, we begin with the title track by The Bee Gees, then Chris Brown. Evanescence sneaks in this century’s rock track, then we go back in time to CCR, The Doors and the Rolling Stones. We complete with a ten minute epic by Chic and Sister Sledge, enjoy, it rocks: How can you mend a Broken Heart!!!

In my heartbreak, I have started a new tribe around my ethos Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. It is called Thriving People – People who wish to make a difference to Humanity, my intention is a 1,000,000 people take up the challenge, here is the link to join, I would love you too: Thriving People.

Until we meet again my dear friends.

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You Know, It’s Never to Late!!!


Twelve years ago, after an emotionally abusive long term relationship I decided subconsciously I would never put myself through that again and chose the Life of Being single. I started doing personal development stuff and looked at different issues over the years, this one seemed to slip through to the keeper. Then I met a woman at Mojo. The first time we eye gazed for twenty minutes, the second time we screamed at each other for ten.

I didn’t know what to do, as a single man she could have asked me to fuck her on the dance floor and I probably would have said no. So I spoke to my mentor, who unpacked my single man decision. We then went through an exercise imagining her walk through the door and to see how close she could get to me. Not really close at all at first, just a few steps into the room. Many sessions later, it allowed me to be standing next to her with her in my arms. Nothing happened with this woman, because I was ages away from breaking the single man mould.

Two years later and several failed attempts by women, I have the honour to be in a relationship with a woman I had known six years. She is brave, confronting, loving and willing to go the whole nine yards to make it work. At times I am shit scared that it will not work out again and at other times there is so much ecstasy surging through my body I feel that I will implode.

So what has the human race said about love relationships, lets have a look:

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1. Everything, my beauty. Not some of it, the fear, the scared little girl, the raging anger, the hurt, all of it.

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2. What is the name of your street? Mine is Ecstacy Street: Love Street.

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3. Was I in love before that totally unexpected phone call, maybe?

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4. This is the final destination I seek: That’s What Friends Are For.

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5. I cannot put this into actual words, its a feeling.

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6. No words and I am a wordsmith: Your Smile.

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7. And see you and have you grow side by side.

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8. I love it that you love God, Beauty: Love Of My Life.

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9. Sound familiar?

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10. I hand these to you willingly, beauty: Somebody to Love.

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11. Even when my scared little boy identity fucks up and makes your heart ache, I remember your orgasmic smile.

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12. Helen Keller, blind and deaf: Insightfully speaking the truth: You’re Beautiful.

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13. What exactly is need?

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14. Truth 101: I Love You.

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15. And in the final lesson for this blog, I plead guilty as charged.

The title of this blog was meant to contain the word’s, Lost Life Opportunities as well. Why is this relevant? I reached Age Pension age, 66, one week ago. It is never ever too late. I must mention my life ethos of Love and Respect, Everyone Included. But I will finish with a question, what is going on that humanity trains our hearts to not trust they can be totally loved?

The playlist of love songs starts with The Doors, then the soulful Dionne Warwick and friends, also Rene and Angela.. next, Queen by two.  The penultimate song is by James Blunt and we complete with the one-hit wonders from the sixties, The Volumes: You Know, It’s Never to Late!!!

Until we meet again, my dear friends.

Be Vewy, Vewy Quiet. We’re Hunting Vampires!!!


Is the above statement impossible? What amazingly achievable things did you do today that will they make the difference you wish to on the planet. This is a quite common thought process I have when I am not sure and there does not appear to be much evidence they are. Another list from my friends Marc and Angel Chernoff that points out some simple things we can do:

1. Smile – Smiling actually makes you happier.

2. Treat everyone with kindness and respect – even those who are rude to you, because you do.

3. Perform one selfless act – In life, you get what you put in.

4. Avoid needless drama and those who create it – life is too short to spend time with people who suck the joy out of you.

5. Think of the positives – Stop being afraid of what could go wrong.

6. Inject a little love into the world around you – Love what you are doing, Love where you are, Love the people you are with.

7. Take decisive and immediate action on something that needs to get done – You can’t change anything or make any real-world progress without action

8. Follow your intuition when making decisions – Only time will tell, but our human instincts are rarely wrong.

9. Spend time on something you believe in – Follow your heart today.

10. Meet someone new – You’ll be surprised at the lessons they teach you.

11. Exercise and Eat Healthy – Those who exercise have a higher sense of self-accomplishment and self-worth.

12. Be a student of life – If you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready when great opportunities arise.

So how has society commented on what is and how do we achieve over time, here are a few of my favourites:

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1. Not everyone will agree with you.

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2. Imagine the resolve it would have taken to be an African American tennis player who won Wimbledon in the 1970s: Anything You Can Do.

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3. The Japanese understand vision and action.

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4. Add an arrow to your quiver every day: My Heart Scares You and a Gun Doesn’t.

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5. Being versus doing your goals, different animals.

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6. What if they say no: Permission.

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7. And you can fall off the end of the earth.

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8. Another way of saying it is to Find your Why: Respect.

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9. Lautner was born on February 11, 1992, in Grand Rapids, Michigan,[3] the son of Deborah and Daniel Lautner. His mother works for a software development company, while his father was a Midwest Airlines pilot. He has one younger sister named Makena. Raised as a Roman Catholic, Lautner has Austrian, Dutch, English, French, German, Irish, and Swiss ancestry, and has stated that he has “distant” Native American ancestry (specifically Ottawa and Potawatomi) through his mother. He grew up in Hudsonville, Michigan, a town near Grand Rapids. He has stated that he was bullied in school because he was an actor. He commented, “I just had to tell myself ‘I can’t let this get to me. This is what I love to do. And I’m going to continue doing it.’

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10. People miss the point of this song. It’s not arguing that you should sit around, wish for things, and not take any action. It’s arguing that you should never give up hope: When You Wish Upon A Star.

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11. Every action must simply become that, an action that takes you forward or backward from where you are before you took it.

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12. If you build the door, it will open for you: Hound Dog and Dialogue.

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13. Dan wrote a book called How Many People Does It take to Make a Difference, what do you think the answer is?

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14. What are your courageous dreams?: Empire State of Mind.

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15. And for our final lesson, we visit another musical score.

Marc and Angel say the following question is the one they get asked the most, ” What can I start doing today to make my life happier and more rewarding?” Take on some of the above actions and I am sure that this will occur in your life.

The playlist today contains two show tunes and a track from over 60 years ago by a legend. We begin with Annie Get Your Gun then two newbies to me via Harley x Joker and Ro James. Aretha Franklin belts it out live next. Jiminy Cricket croons the next show tune. Elvis is our 60-year-old contribution and we finish with Alicia Keys: Be Vewy, Vewy Quiet. We’re Hunting Vampires!!!

We all have different things we want to achieve in our lives, one of my main ones is to have Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included be the world paradigm. I will need a few of the above actions on a daily basis, methinks. until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Don’t Wait Until You’ve Reached Your Goal!!!


Celebrate, Celebrate Good Times: Great song, it will probably be on the playlist but is what it is saying true. I beg to differ, I think our purpose in life is to celebrate all times and that our ups and downs in life are our training ground to have this occur.

I have 5,000 Facebook friends, some I know better than others but I send all of them a Facebook Birthday card, somedays it is up to 30 people but this is one form of celebration I have taken on so I have not limited the time it takes me. I do have a standard male and female formulae and some of my close friends I do special ones for. I am surprised by how many people contact me personally and thank me. So as birthdays and deathdays are our main forms of celebrations what about the other days of the year?

I went to a friends birthday at the Abbotsford Convent yesterday, Dan is a beautiful man, there was his partner Theresa and our mutual friend Karina there. I met two of my 5,000 FB friends for the first time, Shanti and Roman, great people, all of who have interesting things to contribute to a celebration. Remember, as we mature it becomes less important to have a lot of friends and more important to have real ones.

So what do friends do differently to people who just walk past each other on the street:

1. They face problems together

2. They give what they can because they truly care.

3. They make time for each other.

4. They offer each other freedom.

5. They communicate effectively.

6. They accept each other as is.

7. They are genuine and accept genuineness.

8. They compromise.

9. They support each other’s growth changes.

10. They believe in each other.

11. They maintain realistic expectations of their relationship.

12. They honour each other in small ways on a regular basis.

13. They listen, and they hear every word.

14. They keep their promises.

15. They stick around.

What has life said about celebrating friendship and life in general, here are a few of my favourites:

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1. Why do we not celebrate many moments between life and death?

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2. Remember, you came here for a purpose, lets make it an inspiring one: Message In a Bottle.

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3. Oprah would have something to say about this.

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4. A great thing to celebrate: Celebrate Good Times.

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5. Love and Gratitude are two other words that are part of the celebration recipe.

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6. George Bernard Shaw, known at his insistence simply as Bernard Shaw, was an Irish playwright, critic, polemicist and political activist. His influence on Western theatre, culture and politics extended from the 1880s to his death and beyond: Laughter In The Rain.

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7. The celebration is not always about happy, happy.

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8. Choose to be alive: Born To Be Alive.

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9. What happens to celebrations when the festival season is over.

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10. Hathaway supports several charities and causes. She is a board member of the Lollipop Theatre Network, an organization that brings films to sick children in hospitals, and advocates gender equality as a UN Women goodwill ambassador. She is married to businessman Adam Shulman, with whom she has a son: Unconditionally.

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11. Your Celebrate Life fridge magnets.

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12. How would you live your life differently if the life expectancy age was 40: Africa.

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13. The Greatest gift you can give to another.

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14. More fridge magnets: Hallelujah.

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15. And for our final lesson today, be all there.

Remember, life is kind of like a party. You invite a lot of people, some leave early, some stay all night, some laugh with you, some laugh at you, and some show up really late. But after the fun, there are a few who stay and help you clean up the mess. And most of the time, they aren’t even the ones who made the mess. These people are your real friends in life. They are the ones to celebrate life with.

How did Neil Sedaka, Kate Perry and KD Lang get on the same playlist? They all sing songs of celebration. We begin with The Police, followed by Kool and the Gang. Neil is next, then back to disco and Patrick Hernandez. Kate drags us back to the present. We finish with Toto and KD: Don’t Wait Until You’ve Reached Your Goal!!

So, I reckon if we all chose to celebrate life more, my ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included would occur sooner than later. Remember you can have these blogs sent to your inbox from the box on the right-hand side of the main page. Until we meet again my dear friends.

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You Can Never Go Back!!!


After doing 9 transformational workshops in 2018 it has been a bit quiet on that front this year. Just my first stop year-long training Warriors of Love with the Essence School: For your edification up until now. I have completed a one-day vulnerability workshop and the amazing Awakening Connections. Level Two in the past two weeks. Both provided a new level of being alive. Here is the mission of Awakening Connections:

We believe that at our human core our greatest longing is to be seen, felt and heard by those we love.
Awakening Connections is a new paradigm of relating that empowers people to come into deeper wholeness, love and truth.
We know a world exists where humans feel enlivened within themselves which in turn creates an opening for healthy, sexy and inspired relationships.
Relationships with self and others are the most challenging emotional experiences we face, asking us to continually evolve and grow.
We give people the ability to really step into and navigate the challenges we face and turn them into gold.
Awakening Connections celebrates the journey of relationship through embracing both its ecstatic potential as well as the gritty, real and raw nature of the human experience.
It’s time to create extraordinary relationships, are you ready?
Did they deliver on this, I would have to say FUCK YES in spades. For privacy reasons, even though as adults we did not have this agreement to reveal the contents of the course I will reveal the last practice at the end of this blog. But lets have a look at what society has said about the values of transformational experiences over time:
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1. Yes, he is a chef, a quite famous one, but this so relates to our lives.
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2. Have you seen that meme of the guy on the bike riding what we think life is like and the one below with the entangled ball of string that represents what life is truly like, this is saying the same thing, be courageous: Live Your Life.
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3. Sir Richard’s take on it.
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4. This was written quite a while ago, to me he is still speaking the truth: Free.
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5. From the world’s best-known cardigan wearer comes this powerful statement on transformation.
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6. I think it says Patti Smith, not sure: Because The Night.
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7. My man Thich Nhat Hanh, you rock.
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8. We discussed trust and safety quite a bit over the four days of the journey: Surrender.
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9. Lot’s of Heart opening too.
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10. I had the privilege of seeing one of the other participant’s souls, it was an ecstatic experience: Soul Sacrifice.
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11. What is wonderful about this type of workshop is you can go the whole gamut of life from rage to silence and this is what is provided.
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12. From ancient China is the offering of the whole world when it lands in your soul: We are the Champions.
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13. Welcome to your new career, my fellow participants.
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14. So here is a song that was played towards the end, not nearly loud enough. This song is meant to be so loud it rocks your soul: Lust for Life.
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15. And for the final lesson, this is what transformational experiences do. It turns the numbness and the noise down. And you get to hear your soul’s passion.
On the final day, we gave up our old lives, asked our partner to hold our old fears, mine was: Will you hold my Neediness of and total mistrust of women, she accepted. We walked down the aisle and my new vows are:
I vow to stand in my power, I vow to be a legendary lover, I vow to do what it takes to get the job done, I vow to have an open heart at all times, I vow to let love in and I vow to be part of healing the planets pain schisms through spreading Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included across the Globe.
The playlist today begins in the now and then goes back to the past to some of the classic transformational anthems: We begin with T.I. and Rhianna, moving on to Rudimental and Emeli Sande. Patti Smith then rocks your world, back further to the king Elvis. Then we complete with two out of the final three tracks being my all-time favourites. Santana from Woodstock, Google it if you don’t know what Woodstock was, followed by Queen telling you who you are, then completing with Iggy Pop as we did on the final day, remember as loud as possible: You Can’t Go Back.
So if you get to create your vows in such a supportive bubble your life with be different from the moment you take them. Thank you so much, Alley, Shaney and Jared, we owe you big time. Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included.

When It Hurts, Observe!!


Have you thought about what areas you have personally developed yourself in in 2018? For me, it has been in the areas of Expanding the Box of my Consciousness and Sexuality. Here are some statements about what may stop you from Personal Development by Marc Chernoff:

  1. The acquisition of knowledge doesn’t mean you’re growing.
  2. Growing happens when what you know changes how you live.
  3. It’s not so much about finding opportunities as it is about creating them.
  4. No matter How Smart You Are, You Will make Mistakes.
  5. A good idea without action is nothing at all.
  6. What we don’t start Today, Won’t be finished Tomorrow.
  7. If you keep doing what you’re doing, You’ll keep getting what you’re getting.
  8. There is a lesson in everything you do, and learning the lesson is how you move forward.
  9. The Harder you work, The luckier you will Become.
  10. Nobody succeeds all by themselves.
  11. Being busy and being productive are two different things.
  12. Being successful is a journey, not a destination.
  13. Tough Times don’t last, but Tough People do.
  14. Having a plan, Even a flawed one at first is better than no plan at all.
  15. It’s uncomfortable to challenge the Status Quo, But it’s worth it.
  16. Lots of successful people have failed as many times as they have succeeded.

I like the saying by Mae West: You Only Live Once, But If You Do It Right, Once Is Enough. Apologies to the Reincarnationists amongst my readers. Let’s have a look at how society views Personal Development:

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1. Open that heart up the whole way.

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2. Remember you grow the longer you are on the journey: Don’t Look Back In Anger.

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3. But remember to find others to play with.

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4. Another way of saying it is get rid of these toxic people out of your life as soon as possible: One Day.

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5. And they say it in every language across the planet.

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6. And what would a blog on Personal Development be without a little Brene Brown: I’m Not The Only One.

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7. And from the man in the cardigan, comes the theory of madness.

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8. And to do this we need to keep our eyes, mind and heart wide open at all times: Boo’d Up.

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9. And of course, we need some Steve Covey.

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10. Time to put down that book you know so well, and start your brand new life: Feeling Good.

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11. Smile for the camera, it can even be a selfie.

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12. Hermann Karl Hesse was a German-born poet, novelist, and painter. His best-known works include DemianSteppenwolfSiddhartha, and The Glass Bead Game, each of which explores an individual’s search for authenticity, self-knowledge and spirituality. In 1946, he received the Nobel Prize in Literature.: Be Yourself.

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13. Herman was quite prolific on the subject.

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14. Don’t try and logically make your development fit in, after all, it is your unique offering: The Eyes of Truth.

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15. And here is an opportunity to take your own marriage vows.

If we can find the patience to see the world for what it is – dynamic, flexible and loaded with untapped potential – and if we can  accept the fact  that change is an inevitable and brilliant part of life, then we can partake in the thrill of progression, and help shape a world in which the impossible becomes possible.

Two oldies and quite a few people I have not heard of inhabit the Playlist today, we begin with Oasis, then Matisyahu. The crooner Sam Smith follows, then three new to me: Ella Mai, Avicii and Peruquios, finishing up with Enigma: When It Hurts, Observe!!

Spread Love and Respect For All, Everyone included with those you interact in this holiday time:

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Headphones On, World Off!!


I am reading Brene browns new book, Braving the Wilderness: Brene’s Website. Using my formulae of writing about what is on the page I open the book too, today we are discussing the rise of loneliness amongst our society. Sorting, or living and hanging around with people who hold the same beliefs as you have become more prevalent: in the American 2016 election 80 per cent of counties gave either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton a landslide victory. In 1980, 20 per cent of American reported they were lonely; the figure is double that now.

This seems counterproductive, sorting and loneliness. If we are living in a like-minded community, shouldn’t we naturally feel like we belong? In her book, Brene quotes neuroscience researcher John Cacioppo of the University of Chicago who has been studying loneliness for over 20 years. He defines loneliness as “perceived social isolation” and states we feel loneliness when we feel disconnected. At the heart of loneliness is the absence of meaningful social interactions —- an intimate relationship, friendships, family gatherings, or even community or workgroup connections.

So, what does society have to say about the state of loneliness? There were many negative quotes, but I have chosen to stay with the more positive aspects of loneliness:

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1. Rocker philosopher Henry Rollins paints a beautiful scene with his words on the matter. How great is the term “A Special Burn”.

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2. Can’t quite make out the name of who said this, but how many times have we curled up in life to our favourite tracks hoping that they will make the pain of loneliness go away: Perfect.

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3. During my Mental Health crisis of six years, this thought was always in the background.

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4. On this walk, you get to realise that it is you who has to make the final decision, alone or not: You’ll Never Walk Alone. 

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5. Two words – Self Love.

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6. How we define a situation can clearly give it a different meaning: Solitude.

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7. For those who have suffered the abuse, we wish didn’t exist on our planet.

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8. Some people use escapism to get away from it: Time After Time.

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9. There is someone I am hoping is thinking this at the moment.

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10. John Steinbeck wrote this quote. He won the 1962 Nobel Prize in Literature” for his realistic and imaginative writings, combining as they do sympathetic humour and keen social perception.” He has been called “a giant of American letters,” and many of his works are considered classics of Western literature: Precious Things.

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11. We assume that our life will remain the same, change is the reality.

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12. Carl Jung knew that speaking up was the solution to loneliness. Time to make some requests: Don’t Speak.

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13. I was not a hugger for 59 of my 64 years. They work.

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14. Time to reach out when Satre’s prognosis is in place: Bad Company.

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15. Find the Others.

Here are the final remarks from an interview between Bill Moyers and Maya Angelou:

Moyers: Do you belong anywhere?

Angelou: I haven’t yet.

Moyers: Do you belong to anyone?

Angelou: More and more. I mean. I belong to myself. I’m very proud of that. I am very concerned about how I look at Maya. I like Maya very much. I like the humour and courage very much. And when I find myself acting in a way that isn’t…that doesn’t please me—then I have to deal with that.

Today’s playlist begins with pop icon Ed Sheeran, then we fly back to the 1960’s with Jerry and the Pacemakers. Even further back to Billie Holliday. Then three fine female singers: Clare Danes, Bic Runga and No Doubt. One of the classic English rock bands Bad Company brings it to a close. Here’s the video playlist: Headphones On, World Off.

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

namasteflower

If Not Now , When?


“When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see them you will see yourself. As you treat them, you will treat yourself. As you think of them, you will think of yourself. Never forget this, for in them you will find yourself or lose yourself.”

It is amazing how many quotes written in this and the last century still use the sexist terminology of single genders, I have taken on replacing these words with more appropriate ones that include everyone.

How do you treat your daily encounters with each person? Is it I know what they are like, so I don’t need to listen to what they’re saying or is it what can they teach me today.

How does the world look at our holy encounters, what have we said about it over the generations:

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1. This would be an amazing state to be with another person,  what could we learn about them?

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2. For the better I hope: Change of Heart.

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3. I am part of a group called Sunday Assembly, a secular group that gathers once a month and has a service to celebrate life. Our motto’s are Live Better, Help Often and Wonder More.

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4. From the 12th Century comes Dante’s contribution, let’s resonate more and more: Soul Kind of Feeling.

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5. It is hard to believe that the magnificent lotus begins its journey through mud.

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6. The greatest form of holy encounter, and what is more powerful than anything: Love: Beauty and the Beast.

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7. It was Martin Luther King day yesterday, I watched a special. It was like every word he spoke was a quote on Love.

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8. That’s why I meditate daily , to be alert and awake: Say It Right.

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9. Epictetus taught that philosophy is a way of life and not just a theoretical discipline. To Epictetus, all external events are beyond our control; we should accept calmly and dispassionately whatever happens. However, individuals are responsible for their own actions, which they can examine and control through rigorous self-discipline.

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10. I think I am denying it at the moment, the feeling and events will just not go away: Only You.

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11. That’s what they read out at your passing, your acts of love not your assets.

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12. Too cute not to use: Elephant Love Medley.

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13. In the 1950s, Mignon began publishing aphorisms that were later collected in three books, entitled, The Neurotic’s Notebook, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook and The Complete Neurotic’s Notebook. She is known for a number of quotes, among them:

  • “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”
  • “Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.”
  • “Every society honors its live conformists and its dead troublemakers.”

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14. One of the great statements about self holy encounter, Helen Keller live a magnificent life with issues most of us would have given up with: God’s Plan.

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15. Another take on the opening quote by Eckhart Tolle.

We decide want we want too see before we see it. We receive what we request “Projection makes Perception”. We can find – and in fact we will find what we look for in life. Our spirit or soul takes responsibility for what we chose to perceive, fear and hate or love and joy> It is up to each of us what path we go down.

Music today is from Cyndi Lauper, Australia’s fabulous Dynamic Hepnotics, Celine Dion and Peabo Bryson, Nelly Furtado, a classic oldie by the Platters, Molin Rouge and Drake.

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

namasteflower