There Lies Hidden Love in Each Friendship!!


Just spent a glorious weekend looking at Relationship with my fellow Warriors Of Love: Where we Hangout on line. One of the distinctions we looked at was How attachments learnt at an early age from our parents affect our ability to relate to society, as I had learnt a new set of distinctions on public speaking over the 6 previous weeks it felt like distinction overload. I relooked at it today and can see the benefit of studying the ideas a bit and how attachment can run your life.

So how has society dealt with attachment over the years, lets have a look:

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1. I think they call it Mindfulness these days.

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2. There is no try, yummy: Yoda’s Wisest Words.

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3. Ralph Marston  was a professional football player who spent a season in the National Football League with the Boston Bulldogs in 1929. His incisive motivational quotes are still used to this day.

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4. His Holiness rocks: Contemplate Impermanence.

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5. We are taught this from a young age, it takes a lot of practice to get over our early training.

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6. I spent quite a bit of time away from my mum early on, it may have had some effect later on to my relatioships, ha ha: Can’t Remember to Forget You.

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7. One word, Boom.

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8. Due to the early influences we need to practice this on a daily ongoing basis: Let Go of Attachment.

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9. The millennials take at it.

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10. Laughing at yourself, real Self Love: I Love to Laugh.

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11. Yasmin Mogahed received her B.S. Degree in Psychology and her Masters in Journalism and Mass Communications from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. After completing her graduate work, she taught Islamic Studies and served as a youth coordinator. She also worked as a writing instructor at Cardinal Stritch University and a staff columnist for the Islam section of InFocus News. Currently she’s an instructor for  AlMaghrib Institute, a writer for the Huffington Post, an international speaker, and author, where she focuses most of her work on spiritual and personal development. Yasmin recently released her new book, Reclaim Your Heart, which is now available worldwide. Visit her website, yasminmogahed.com, where you can find a collection of her articles, poetry, and lectures.

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12. Now known as spiritual bypassing: Spiritual Bypassing.

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13. One of a humans shadows, having to be in control, not easy to let go.

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14. Is this Enlightenment?: Young and Beautiful.

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15. And we finish with some uber wisdom from Ram Dass, if you need it or don’t there’s still work to be done.

I lost the sheet about the attachment styles so have meandered a bit from it, but it is worth a read.

The play list contains a lot of Spoken Word and even one silent track. We begin with Yoda, then to the silence of Art at Chance. one of our three female singers is next, it’s Shakira. Back to spoken word with Alan Watts. The over to the musical Mary Poppins. The penultimate spoken word is from Candance Van Dell and we finish with a sultry number by Lana Del Ray: There Lies Hidden Love in Each Friendship!!

I believe that racism comes from us attaching to the identities we are taught to attach to at an early age. That is why my mission is to have the world paradigm be Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included.

Until next we meet, my dear friends.

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Freedom is a State of Mind!!


Going off the grid for 5 days from 6AM tomorrow morning, off to Confest for the first time in 30 years with two of my friends who are Confest virgins. A little about the festival: ConFest (Conference/Festival) is a gathering of people wishing to share talents, skills, ideas, concerns and philosophies in a caring fun loving and tolerant atmosphere. The presentation of workshops, demonstrations, entertainments and the maintenance of site facilities are all performed by volunteers, monetary payment is neither accepted nor made.

At ConFest, people often set up villages with differing themes. ConFest is a clothing optional space, this means ConFesters can wear, or not wear anything they chose. Everywhere at ConFest is clothes optional. Don’t be surprised to have a naked ticket collector when you arrive at the ConFest gate. Clothing can range from nothing to body paint, a coat of mud, a sheet, a fairy costume, even a ball gown or dinner suit. At ConFest, clothing is not gendered specific. There is just one simple rule, respect other ConFester’s choices. A long-running and very popular ConFest tradition is the communal artist’s studio. Activities include body and sign painting, life drawing, clay work, organic art, photography etc. Artists, models and workshop facilitators are always welcome.

I am looking forward to returning, last time I went it was around 1,000 people, it is now over 6,000. How do 6,000 people express their own individual shades of freedom? Then, how does society comment on personal freedom, let’s have a look:

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1. I love that saying, there is only climbing.

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2. Its all in the air: The Air that I Breathe.

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3. Thucydides has been called the father of the school of political realism, which views the political behaviour of individuals and the subsequent outcomes of relations between states as ultimately mediated by and constructed upon the emotions of fear and self-interest.

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4. You got to fight for the right to…: You’ve got to Fight…

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5. Mail, Key, Bike, etc. etc. etc.

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6. There are rules that you are not meant to follow in your life, they are your bullshit rules: Nkosi Sikilel iAfrika.

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7. The next step after freedom.

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8. I . have met many of these fine people in the past six years of my healing journey, far too many to mention, you know who you are, Thank you: Love Street.

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9. It travels hand in hand with integrity.

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10. Nothing, Nada, No way, Fuck Off: No Way, Get Fucked, Fuck Off.

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11. One word – Rumi!!

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12. It may be known as Nirvana: Come as You Are.

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13. Ask, expect. depend: Cry Freedom.

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14. The curly haired eccentric one knows how to say it: Believe.

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15. And our final lesson, two words: Fuck Yes.

What workshops will I do, they go all day supposedly. I will do ones that touch my heart.

Today’s playlist is great. A classic from The Hollies, The Beastie Boys next imploring you to …, A stirring National Anthem is thrown in next. Three of my faves from different eras, The Doors, The Angels from OZ, finishing with Nirvana. Mumford and Sons close it out with a plea to our senses: Freedom is a State of Mind.

Freedom to me would be the world living from Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. Until we meet again on the other side, my dear friends.

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Humans are still the most extraordinary Computer of All!!


How am I feeling after our Warriors of Love training day on Identity and Essence offered by Arion Light and his Essence School? Link to a New Future.

My Essence is Trust in Intimacy and sees me on a journey as to what it would take to have life be intimate moment by moment in my daily interactions with my family, friends, workmates, and potential lovers as that is an area I am working on after a ten year drought and a 12 month amazing journey.

We did an exercise on giving feedback in regards to our identities and our Essence. All went well as the first two people got it right in giving me feedback to my identity that was areas they thought I could improve in coming from I love you, Rod. Bring on the third person, who started by praising my identity which brought up the following thought, Wait, you are doing it wrong and then an aha moment that I related that my identity was all that was wrong about me and that if people really knew that about me they would never speak to me let alone interact with me in a relationship.

So, how has the human race spoke about Identity and Essence, let’s have a wee look:

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1. Busyness vs. Passion, The choice is up to you.

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2. Mahatma, we are called the Warriors of Love, 33 and expanding: Faith.

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3. We leave no one behind.

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4. I work at a place called the Darebin Intercultural Centre. The word Intercultural was specifically chosen to empower what the above quote is pointing at: Common Cultures.

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5. John Abbot (1751-c.1840) was an American naturalist and artist. He was the first artist in the New World to create an extensive series of insect drawings and to show insects in all stages of development. In addition to more than 3000 insect illustrations, he also produced drawings of birds and plants. He obviously believed all creatures were part of the earth’s culture.

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6. Another Warrior’s essence is clarity, this quote reminds me of his stand for it: Set Your Controls for the Heart of the Sun.

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7. Do you know what you really want?

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8. How fucking beautiful is this from Albert, rocks my world: Real Love.

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9. Not up to them, It’s up to you and the actions you are willing to take it to make it happen.

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10. I love the way Brene Brown says it: Dare to Lead: Dare To Lead.

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11. A missing from current society is the power of the storytelling circle.

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12. Boom: It’s My Life.

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13. Made me think of the saying: Opposites Attract, well done Stephen.

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14. When I am with the Warriors of Love I feel this so strongly: Illuminating the Soul.

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15. And for our final lesson for the day, have some ridiculous fun.

Moving onto the Essence conversations, I have big boots to fill, I am up for it.

Today’s playlist is a little eccentric. George Michael funks out the first track, then some intercultural kids from Western Sydney, Bysa. A classic Pink Floyd song takes you to …, followed by a very gospelly number by Blanca.  Brene Brown then lays some truth on us then some good old rock and roll from Bon Jovi. We finish with a contemplative piece about the soul: Humans Are.

My ethos to fill those boots is, Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. Till next time we meet again, dear friends.

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Self Awareness and Self Love Matter!!


Up to Section 5 of Dare to Lead, Brene Brown’s exciting new book: Get It Here.

The section is titled Curiosity and Grounded Confidence and begins: “Grounded confidence is the messy process of learning and unlearning, practising and failing, and surviving a few misses. This brand of confidence is not blustery arrogance or posturing or built on bullshit; it’s real, solid, and built on self-awareness and practice. Once we witness how courage can transform the way we lead, we can trade the heavy, suffocating armour that keeps us small for grounded confidence that lifts us up and supports our efforts to be brave.” It’s unreasonable to believe that we can just rip off our self-protection mechanisms and streak through the office. Most of us armour up early in our lives because, as children, we needed to.

Brene then goes on about the paradoxes that elicit vulnerability in leaders and provides this excellent list:

  1. Optimism and Paranoia
  2. Letting chaos reign ( the act of building ) and reining in chaos ( the act of scaling )
  3. Big heart and tough decision making
  4. Humility and fierce resolve
  5. Velocity and quality when building new things
  6. Left brain and Right Brain
  7. Simplicity and Choice
  8. Thinking Global, acting Local
  9. Ambition and attention to detail
  10. Thinking big but starting small
  11. Short-term and long-term
  12. Marathons and sprints, or marathons of sprints in business-building

In a conversation with Dheeraj Pandey, CEO of a Silicon Valley IT company, Dheeraj says the following, “Leaders must learn the skills to hold these tensions and get adept at balancing on the ‘tightrope’ of life. Ultimately, leadership is the ability in the ambiguity of paradoxes and opposites.”

So, what does the world say about paradoxes and opposites, here are a few of my favourite things:

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1. How well do I embrace and opposites, better some days than others, a lifetime practice, methinks?

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2. Reads like lines from a really great song: Radiate.

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3. The gravity man, Sir Isaac Newton, watch out for the apples.

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4. The Light and the Dark, both are needed to transform: I Gotta Feeling.

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5. Anything goes, it is all required in our journey of life.

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6. That’s very Woo Woo, Albert: God Save The Queen.

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7. Fact check, did our favourite POTUS really say this?

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8. What do you say to your soul, I’m practising with I love You for five minutes in the mirror every day: A Whole New World.

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9. Something Judgement 101 does not allow.

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10. The classic reason why opposites attract, they are incomplete without their opposite, how many modalities teach us we need all the types of archetypes, personalities, etc. etc. etc: New Speedway Boogie.

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11. I post Ram Dass daily in Booker Looker land, he is one of my top ten faves on the net.

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12. More light and dark stuff, you can’t deny either for your life to work: Duality.

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13. They are sent to you to learn from them, what you resist persists, an old Landmark statement from the 1990’s that still rings true to this day.

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14. Best known for his book, The Myth of Equality, Wystma, a minister of the gospel helps us come to a deeper understanding of both the origins of these issues and the reconciling role people are called to play as a follower of the gospel. Inequality and privilege are real. The Myth of Equality opens our eyes to realities we may have never realized were present in our society and world. And we will be changed for the better as a result: Glory.

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15. The paradox of being attracted by an opposite, what are yours, mine is booze versus sobriety.

Brene sums it up as follows ” Learning how to rumble with vulnerability is work. And vulnerability never becomes comfortable, but practising means that when a vulnerability is washing over us, we can hear grounded confidence whisper in our ear, ” This is hard and awkward, and uncomfortable. You may not know how it’s turning out, but you are strong and you have practised what it takes to create and hold the space for it.” 

If you haven’t work it out from these two blogs, buy the book. It’s worth it for the free workbook and the glossary alone, not to mention the values list and the posters you get thrown in.

If you loved punk, there is a song for you on today’s playlist. We begin with a newbie for me, Hannah Kerr, then the iconic Black Eyed Peas, then the legend that is Johny Rotten leading the Sex Pistols. Another Disney classic from Alladin. An Aussie legend Courtney Barnett, then rocking out with Slipknot, then a beautifully smooth finish from John Legend: Self Awareness and Self Love Matter.

Spread Love and Respect to All, Everybody Included until next, we meet my dear friends:

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Never tell people how to do Things, Tell them what to Do.


This list is from John C. Maxwell’s excellent book: The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Get It Here.

What would happen if a top expert with more than thirty years of leadership experience was willing to distil everything he had learned about leadership into a handful of life-changing principles just for you? It would change your life! John C. Maxwell has done exactly that in “21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership”. He has combined insights learned from his thirty-plus years of leadership successes and occasional mistakes with observations from the worlds of business, politics, sports, religion, and military conflict. The result is a revealing study of leadership delivered as only a communicator like Maxwell can. Here is the list:

THE 21 LAWS OF LEADERSHIP

1. The Law of the Lid. There’s a lid to your potential; it’s determined by your leadership ability. Therefore, expand your leadership capacity and expand your ability to impact the world.

2. The Law of Influence. As Maxwell says a number of times throughout the book, “The true measure of leadership is influence—nothing more, nothing less.”

3. The Law of Process. We can’t snap our fingers and become great leaders overnight. Maxwell tells us: “Leadership develops daily, not in a day.” 

4. The Law of Navigation. Steering the ship is relatively easy. Leaders chart the course—seeing where they want to go and charting the most effective course to get there.

5. The Law of Addition. Leaders serve. They focus on creating value for others. It’s not so much “What’s in it for me?” but “How can I serve?” That’s the law of addition.

6. The Law of Solid Ground. Maxwell tells us that trust is the foundation of leadership. We must stand on the solid ground of solid character—living with integrity, being trustworthy.

7. The Law of Respect. People “naturally follow leaders stronger than themselves.” We must cultivate our strength if we want people to respect us and be willing to follow our lead.

8. The Law of Intuition. As Emerson says, we must trust ourselves—“every heart vibrates to that iron string.” As a mentor of mine once said, “Trust yourself. Always.”

9. The Law of Magnetism. Who you ARE is who you will attract. Want to attract great people? BE GREAT. That’s the law of magnetism.

10. The Law of Connection. We must connect with others. Maxwell tells us, “Leaders touch a heart before they ask for a hand.”

11. The Law of Inner Circle. Our potential as leaders is determined by those closest to us. Whose in your inner circle?

12. The Law of Empowerment. You need to be confident enough to give power to others. Trust yourself and trust your team to crush it.

13. The Law of the Picture. People will do what they see. We need to create a “picture” of what awesome looks like which inspires people to follow our lead. Embody your ideals.

14. The Law of Buy-In. You have a great vision. Fantastic. (And essential.) But know this: People buy into YOU, the leader before they buy into the vision.

15. The Law of Victory. Victory. Leaders are FIERCELY committed to winning. Period. That relentless pursuit of victory is essential. (We’ll chat about this more as well.)

16. The Law of Big Mo. Mr Momentum. Is a very close friend of effective leaders. We need to create (and celebrate!) little wins—always remembering that progress is uber-powerful.

17. The Law of Priorities. It’s not enough to be busy. We need to be effective. Leaders take the time to properly line up their dominoes and focus on what’s most important.

18. The Law of Sacrifice. The higher you go, the more you need to be willing to give up. Leaders trade-off freedom with responsibility.

19. The Law of Timing. As Jim Collins says in Great By Choice, not all moments are created equal. Leaders know when to lean in and seize the moment.

20. The Law of Explosive Growth. Maxwell tells us about “leader’s math”—if you want to multiply your growth, create more LEADERS not followers.

21. The Law of Legacy. What do you want people to say at your funeral? Leaders keep this vision firmly in mind and dedicate their lives to its fulfilment. A quick inventory: Favourites? Strengths? Weaknesses?

“In a study of ninety leaders from a variety of fields, leadership experts Warren Bennis and Burt Nanus made a discovery about the relationship between growth and leadership: ‘It is the capacity to develop and improve their skills that distinguish leaders from their followers.’ Successful leaders are learners. And the learning process is ongoing, a result of self-discipline and perseverance. The goal each day must be to get a little better, to build on the previous day’s progress.

So how many of the Laws do you work on daily, here’s what the world says about Leadership:

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1. You can’t do it on your own, Go that way and it will work out is what the leader is there for.

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2. Master, Miss, Ms, Dr, Mrs, Mister, they are titles, being a leader is not: If You’re Out There.

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3. Actions not words, Leadership 101.

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4. Obviously, they are speaking about Donald Trumps leadership style, aren’t they: When I’m Gone.

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5. I don’t take up the Challenge every day, do you?

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6. Presence, Presence, Presence, Leadership: My Immortal.

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7. Mark Yarnell died in 2015, lauded as the Worlds greatest network Marketer, he was truly inspiring — “I’ve lived a “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah” life he said. “I’ve squeezed every ounce of joy out of every single day. It’s been an absolute blast!” And, he encouraged each of us to become the best possible version of ourselves while living a life of freedom.

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8. Even for your mistakes, that’s what real leadership is: Responsibility.

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9. Are you the former or the latter, Your Choice.

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10. Trying leadership on: Try.

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11. Word origin of ‘courage’: Middle Eastern & Old French – corage, heart, spirit  Latin cor, heart. Where we find our passion, In the heart.

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12. I recently came back in contact with Fiona, the woman who showed the leadership to get 13 disparate individuals to travel from Australia to Moscow to run a marathon in the name of ending world hunger, her leadership was inspirational at the time. It was the year before the Berlin Wall came down and communism ended in Russia: Fight Song. 

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13. Remember, it’s your actions that create the opportunities for others to become leaders too.

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14. I would change the middle quotes to Goes there own Way: Go Your Own Way.

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15. It’s OK to take walks, but it’s leadership that makes the difference after all.

As author Hans Finzel observed, ‘Leaders are paid to be dreamers. The higher you go in leadership, the more your work is about the future. At the same time, leaders are practical enough to know that vision without action achieves nothing. They make themselves responsible for helping their followers take action.” Great leaders are BOTH visionary *and* practical.

Today’s songs begin with John Legend, then we travel to the rap of Eminem. Rock takes over for the next three tracks with Evanescence, MxPx and Janis Joplin. It closes out with a very cute video of Rachell Platten and a whole lot of kids and finishes with a classic Fleetwood Mac number: Never tell people how to do Things, tell them what to Do

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

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I Saw That – Karma!!


Exceptionalism = Unusual ; not typical. Reading the Philosophers Notes for Dr Bob Rotella’s great book How Champions Think I was struck by the following statement:

“One of the concepts I struggle with when I work with people both inside and outside of sport is reality. … My job with such people is to get them to understand and believe that exceptional people create their own reality. The average person won’t set a goal unless he thinks, and people close to him think, that he has at least a fifty-fifty chance of reaching it. That’s what the average person considers a realistic goal. The average person takes account of all the information that’s out there saying he can’t do something. If let’s say, he thinks about committing himself to become the best basketball player he can be and getting a college scholarship, he’ll be aware of the fact that maybe one high school player in thirty gets a college scholarship. Since that seems to make the odds a lot worse than fifty-fifty, the average person is likely to give up on that goal before he even commits to trying to reach it, settling for mediocrity in high school and giving up the game thereafter.

The exceptional person, the person who does great things, doesn’t see things that way. The exceptional person has a vision—of great performances, of a great career, of a great something— and doesn’t care about what others might say or think. He ignores information that suggests his dream is unrealistic. He just sets about making that vision a reality. He sees things before others see them. He creates his own reality. Afterwards, other people may say to him, ‘We knew you could do it. We always sensed you were going to be one of the great ones.’ But that’s probably not what he heard in the beginning. In the beginning, he probably heard, ‘You have to be crazy to think you can do that.’”

Rotella says: Average people are “realistic.” Exceptional people CREATE their reality.

So how does society relate to exceptionalism, here are some of the things they say:

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1. As part of exceptionalism, you must relate to the above koan, because you will not always win.

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2. Aren’t we always looking for a sign from God to confirm what we already know, here it is: Gods Plan.

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3. From The Monk who sold his Ferrari, luck has nothing to do with being exceptional, you need to put in the hard yards.

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4. When you ran those ten extra laps when you were a kid, I can still hear my friends calling me crazy, I later became a marathoner: Crazy, Sexy, Wild.

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5. More Ferrari moments.

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6. We create a box early on in our life so people can recognise us, how do you expand it to fit in your amazing: Lose Yourself.

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7. A new standard of imagination, they don’t teach that to you in schools.

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8. Nothing to get in your way as you approach your greatness, they are all left behind: Go The Extra Mile.

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9. Back to the 14th Century and the founder of the Jesuits for a quote that is still relevant today, the former deeds are what makes the difference.

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10. Actress, model, dancer and humanitarian, Audrey Hepburn lived and walked the talk of the second interpretation of the above letters: La Vie En Rose.

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11. Find the others who will say it about you, they are your keepers.

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12. Because its Maya, and she was exceptional: Love Liberates.

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13. Another word for Exceptionalism.

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14. Nine to Five is not it: Nine to Five.

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15. There is no right way for exceptionalism, you have to do what it takes.

Life is a precious (!!!) gift. We’re blessed with an opportunity to see just how good we can be at something we love doing. We get to have a ball for many years seeing how many beautiful things we can do with our lives. For each of us, this is unique. Get out there on the journey to what is your exceptional gift to give to humanity.

Today’s playlist wanders over the generations, something for the millennials and the grandparents. We begin with Drake and Inna for the younger at heart. Back to the beginning of rap with Eminem. Spoken word from Motivation 2016 comes next then from Grannies time Audrey Hepburn, is that French? We finish with two iconic women, Maya Angelou and Dolly Parton. Here’s the link: I saw that – Karma.

Namaste until next time, my dear friends:

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H.O.P.E. – Hold On, Pain Ends


The Steppingstone in time for my Life: 65 Stepping Stones – 2843 Life Power Boosters At Your Fingertips by my ex TMLP buddy Thea Westra: At this site. reads as follows:

Experience “real” life. Are you waiting for “life” to begin? You just need to get some of those hurdles out of the way and need a few things to happen first. The children need to leave home, retirement at work first and then enjoy the things you love, the certain amount of dollars need to be saved, the time needs to be just right, etc. etc. etc… Consider that all these roadblocks ARE your life. When will you choose to experience them fully, along with all the other passing moments?

Boom, take that, the reality of life is that life is our reality. What has society had to say about that over the centuries, let’s have a gander:

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1. Experiences, not things equal reality.

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2. Ah, those first moments of relationships – phone calls at least once a day, later on, we may move to this: The Sounds of Silence.

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3. One could ask Lady Gaga what happened to the percentages, as a child we live more like 80//20.

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4. We are trained from an early age, not to say those things that may hurt another’s feelings. Time to tell a white lie, maybe: Honest.

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5. WTF up!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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6. Søren Aabye Kierkegaard was a Danish philosopher, theologian, poet, social critic and religious author who is widely considered to be the first existentialist philosopher. He wrote critical texts on organized religion, Christendom, morality, ethics, psychology, and the philosophy of religion, displaying a fondness for metaphor, irony and parables. Much of his philosophical work deals with the issues of how one lives as a “single individual”, giving priority to concrete human reality over abstract thinking and highlighting the importance of personal choice and commitment. He was against literary critics who defined idealist intellectuals and philosophers of his time and thought that Swedenborg, Hegel, Goethe, Fichte, Schelling, Schlegel and Hans Christian Andersen were all “understood” far too quickly by “scholars”: Experience.

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7. This insightful quote can certainly make you think about how you value your time.

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8. I had five worst times AKA Pysch hospital admissions, I can so relate to this. The people who hang around are precious: True Colours.

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9. We hear from Soren again, don’t focus on the problems, live life fully: Everybody.

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10. They stick around because they are the people who love you from the bottom of their hearts: That’s what Friends are For.

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11. How’s your search for your reality going?

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12. Have you bruised your knees too often, the trick is to get back up and on the horse again: Try.

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13. Go on, get out there and do it.

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14. And it is said in many ways around the world: Namkeen.

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15. And for the final one today, one I have no idea about.

And the final word from Dale Carnegie – If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done.

Music for this blogs starts with going back over 50 years with Simon and Garfunkel, then the Chainsmokers followed by Ludivico Einaudi. Then over to our female entries, Kasey Chambers, Dionne Warwick and Pink finishing with our international guest R. D. Burnam.

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

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