To the World, You might be Just One Person!!


I received a reply to the message from the woman I say I am in love with, I feel incredibly happy with this, she has been overseas the past six months. At the moment I am reading a book called Love 2.0 by Barbara Fredrickson which redefines our ability to feel the ultimate emotion: Get It Here.

We all know love matters, but in this groundbreaking book positive emotions expert Barbara Fredrickson shows us how much. Even more than happiness and optimism, love holds the key to improving our mental and physical health as well as lengthening our lives. Using research from her own lab, Fredrickson redefines love not as a stable behemoth, but as micro-moments of connection between people–even strangers. She demonstrates that our capacity for experiencing love can be measured and strengthened in ways that improve our health and longevity.

Ready for our new, upgraded definition of love? Love 1.0 = The emotion you feel for your “soul mate” or kids or family; what we hear about on the radio, etc. Love 2.0? Love 2.0 is ubiquitous. It’s that “micro-moment of warmth and connection that you share with another living being.” It’s what Barbara describes as “positivity resonance.”  Love is found in those TINY moments—the micro-moments—in which we are truly present, sharing a positive experience with someone. When that happens, our brains and bodies synchronize in truly stunning ways. Sprinkle in some mutual care for the others’ well being and you have positivity resonance—aka Love. What’s exciting about this upgraded version of love is that it’s not limited to our most intimate relationships (yet, very importantly, can be practised most frequently within them—something I’ve done a bunch of times since picking up the book yesterday). When we allow ourselves to open up to this possibility, we can create more of this positivity resonance with others and experience the extraordinary gains in health and happiness that go with practising this supreme emotion.

So how do we as humans define love, here are a few of my favourite takes at it:

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1. Imagine if we were in contact with those micro-moments of love 24/7. It would transform my life for certain.

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2. Imagine if you glimpsed it every day, it would be blissful: A Slice of Heaven. 

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3. And this is what drops away.

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4. And your micro-moment mission is to…: When You Believe.

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5. Not really a choice is it?

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6. And you, and you, and you, and you…: Better Together.

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7. One never knows what those micro-moments of connection can turn into.

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8. Positivity resonance at some times, our greatest fears at others, it is our time to choose: How Deep Is Your Love.

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9. Not really an example of Love 2.0, but I had to fit the bard in somewhere.

 

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10. Definitely possible in both areas of love, one and two: Soul Shakedown Party.

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11. All of the emotions come with Love.

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12. Love is a two-way street: Give Love.

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13. But we always have a favourite.

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14. And then, time for some Rumi: I Love You for What You Are.

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15. And from the Love Prince, Bob Marley comes how to achieve Love 2.0.

Barbara introduces us to the fact that micro-moments of love are created by and result in changes in three main biological characters: your brain, oxytocin, and your vagus nerve. As she says: “Put simply, your body was designed for love, and to benefit from loving.”

Very briefly, when we have positivity resonance, our brains synchronize in astonishing ways. This “neural synchrony” or “neural coupling” is produced as we attune to the individual(s) with whom we’re interacting. Oxytocin, the “love hormone” is, apparently, more appropriately identified as a neuropeptide because it shows up not just in our bodies but also in our brains. Barbara talks about some fascinating research on how increasing levels of oxytocin increase trust and cooperation. Then we get to Vagus. Our vagus nerve is our tenth cranial nerve. “It emerges from your brain stem deep within your skull and, although it makes multiple stops at your various internal organs, perhaps most significantly it connects your brain to your heart.” Hmmm… A physical, biological component of our bodies that connects our brain to our hearts? I’m listening! The short story here: As per all the benefits articulated above, Optimizing our vagus nerve’s functioning is a good idea. Good news is: our “vagal tone” can be developed much like our “muscle tone.” It just takes practice. We’re almost ready for those practices. First, desire.

Today’s playlist begins across the trough from my homeland, for all you others, that’s slang for New Zealand with Dave Dobbyn, then Whitney. A few rocky numbers follow with Jack Johnson, Calvin Harris and Bob Marley. The penultimate number is some soul from Andy Grammer featuring Lunchmoney Lewis, finishing with a Bollywood masterclass.

Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included until we next meet, my dear friends:

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The Good News Is You are the Pilot!!


In their inspiring book Getting Back to Happy: Change your Thoughts, Change Your Reality, and Turn Your Trials into Triumphs: Get It Here., Marc and Angel Chernoff explode myths. The one I am writing on today is that you have to wait for the “right time” to make a change in your life. The truth is it is never too late or too early to be who you are capable of being. There’s no time limit on when you can start living the life you’ve dreamed of. There is no mythical door that shuts after you turn a certain age, blocking you off from experiencing the things you want to do.

Happily, life has a way if throwing red flags when it’s time for us to make a change – we have to be watchful for them. With that in mind, take a look at this list and ask yourself: are any of these the reasons I’m unhappy with my life as it is now?

  1. Fear is Holding me Back.
  2. I catch myself feeding the negative.
  3. My mind is everywhere except right here, right now.
  4. I feel pressured to be someone other than myself.
  5. I feel like I’m competing against everybody else.
  6. A relationship is making me miserable.
  7. I feel bored.
  8. I’ve been resisting change.
  9. Other people are writing my story for me.

If any of these resonate with you, you certainly aren’t alone. Many people are afraid to step forward and change their situation simply because they don’t know how or because they’re afraid to fail. Remember, it’s always better to take an imperfect step forward than to take no step at all.

So, it is time to have a look at what society says about this situation:

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1. Without doing this you live yesterday after yesterday. I think its called Groundhog Day.

 

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2. After several failed attempts, Danny Sullivan won the Indy 500 and totalled $2 million dollars winning from 12 starts: The Time of My Life.

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3. Inspiring Buddhist nun, Pema Chodron, points out that the possibility is now.

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4. You will know when: Right Place, Right Time.

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5. But giving up your fear of failure will give it a more than even chance of it being the right time.

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6. I vote for making it: Hustle.

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7. Watch what they do, not what they say. Actions speak louder than words.

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8. Don’t give up, we all have mistakes along our journey: Don’t Give Up.

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9. They wrote some great song lyrics.

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10. As the navigator, you have to be right here, right now: The Navigator.

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11. Take that imperfect step into the above.

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12. When to do it by a man who changed the direction of the United States: His Greatest Speech.

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13. Begin it Now.

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14. Find the Others: Friends.

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15. We have the same 24 hours as Martin Luther King had, go for your dreams.

Rarely is life going to work out perfectly, and rarely will the stars align. If you’re waiting around to gather all the resources you think you need to take the next step forward, before you know it, you will have wasted all the time you have. Changing your situation is about being mindful of what you want to change- and then finding the one thing you can do first to improve it. That one action might not change everything, but it will put you on the path to something better.

The Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes classic starts the playlist today. Then the million-selling Olly Murs who I had never heard of. Jamelia funks it up next, then a superb live version of Peter Gabriels biggest hit. A  grungy offering from The Pogues, then some wise words from MLK, finishing with Ed Sheeran: The Good News is That you are the Pilot.

Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included until next time we meet, my dear friends.

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Take me to the River!!


Several members of my year-long training program, The Warriors of Love went on an Essence outing to see Dr Joe Dispenza. He was spruiking his new book, Becoming Supernatural: How Common People Are Doing the Uncommon: Get it Here.

Joe talked about that he began to ask himself:

‘What if people begin to believe in themselves instead of something outside of themselves? What if they believe that they can change something inside of them and move themselves to the same state of being as someone who’s taking a placebo? Isn’t that what our workshop participants have been doing in order to get better? Do people really need a pill or injection to change their state of being? Can we teach people to accomplish the same thing by teaching them how the placebo really works?’

He calls this crossing the river of change. Joe speaks about this:

“Crossing the river of change requires that you leave the same familiar predictable self— connected to the same thoughts, same choices, same behaviours, and same feelings—and step into a void of the unknown. The gap between the old self and the new self is the biological death of your old personality. If the old self must die, then you have to create a new self with new thoughts, new choices, new behaviours, and new emotions. Entering this river is stepping toward a new unpredictable, unfamiliar self. The unknown is the only place where you can create—you cannot create anything new from the known.

“Some people call this experience the dark night of the soul. It’s the phoenix igniting itself and burning to ashes. The old self has to die for a new one to be reborn. Of course, that feels uncomfortable!”

So when did you last or have you ever crossed the River of Change, entered the dark night of the soul? We know our favourite cereal, or favourite cafe and our favourite TV show very well. How does the world relate to this, let’s have a look:

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1. Why is it worth doing, because with the dark naturally comes the light.

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2. Neruda became known as a poet when he was 13 years old, and wrote in a variety of styles, including surrealist poems, historical epics, overtly political manifestos, a prose autobiography, and passionate love poems such as the ones in his collection Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair (1924). He won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1971: Pablo Neruda.

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3. The unknown is the only place where you can create—you cannot create anything new from the known.

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4. Oh death remorseless, consume this flesh. Release this soul to begin afresh, truly magnificent: Hold On.

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5. You have to pay the full price to reach the other side.

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6. Many people reach out for a superior being after entering this space: I Wanna Dance with Somebody.

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7. after the death of her father from cancer, Joan, a medical researcher, became more interested in the person with the illness than in the disease itself and returned to Harvard Medical School to complete a second postdoctoral fellowship, this time in the new field of behavioural medicine. 

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8. Free hugs gain you entry: Hugging You.

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9. This may happen along the way, but your new created life awaits you.

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10. Your old thoughts will hold on tightly, they will not want you to leave: The Sounds of Silence.

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11. Joe must have been influenced by Carl, methinks.

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12. In that dark night, it is the voice of the soul that gets us through to the other side: King of Anything.

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13. Your heart burning up during the dark night of the soul. Don’t worry, it will come out all new and shiny on the other side, created by you.

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14. Without the Dark, no Lights: Starman.

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15. And finally what Joe says entering the dark night of the soul will provide: UncoverYourJoy.com.

I will finish with Joe’s main premise: “If this is your personality then your personality creates your personal reality. It’s that simple. And your personality is made up of how you think, how you act, and how you feel. So the present personality who is reading this page has created the present reality called your life; and that also means that if you want to create a new personal reality—a new life—then you have to begin to examine or think about the thoughts you’ve been thinking and change them. You must become conscious of the unconscious behaviours you’ve been choosing to demonstrate that have led to the same experiences, and then you must make new choices, take new actions, and create new experiences.”

Today’s playlist begins with my dear friend Kavisha Paola Mazzella, one of the truly superb voices. next Wilson Phillips, daughters of very famous 60’s musicians. Then a Whitney Houston power ballad. Over to the men for Tom Rosenthal and Disturbed. Penultimate is Sarah Bareilles, finishing with Sir David: Take Me to the River.

Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included until we meet again, my dear friends.

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What if Life is no Gamble?


Scott Adams is the creator of the hugely popular Dilbert cartoon. At the beginning of his career, he found it virtually impossible to find a mentor setting him off on a lifetime journey of researching what it takes to succeed culminating in the writing of his highly popular book, How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big Kind of the Story of My Life : Get It Here. Adams discovered some unlikely truths that helped to propel him forward. For instance: – Goals are for losers. Systems are for winners.
– “Passion” is bull. What you need is personal energy.
– A combination of mediocre skills can make you surprisingly valuable.
– You can manage your odds in a way that makes you look lucky to others. In the book Adams wrote the following:

“You could word-glue goals and systems together if you chose. All I’m suggesting is that thinking of goals and systems as different concepts has power. Goal-oriented people exist in a state of continuous pre-success failure at best, and permanent failure at worst if things never work out. Systems people succeed every time they apply their systems, in the sense that they did what they intended to do. The goals people are fighting the feeling of discouragement at every turn. The systems people are feeling good every time they apply their systems. That’s a big difference in terms of maintaining your personal energy in the right direction.

The systems-versus-goals model can be applied to most human endeavours. In the world of dieting, losing twenty pounds is a goal, but eating right is a system. In the exercise realm, running a marathon in under four hours is a goal, but exercising daily is a system. In business, making a million dollars is a goal, but being a serial entrepreneur is a system. For our purposes, let’s say a goal is a specific objective that you either achieve or don’t sometime in the future. A system is something you do on a regular basis that increases your odds of happiness in the long run. If you do something every day, it’s a system. If you’re waiting to achieve it someday in the future, it’s a goal.”

So how do you live your life, via setting possible goals or following systems, here’s what society says about winning big:

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1. Back in the day, my goal was to run the Moscow Peace Marathon in ten months. My system was to get up at 5 a.m. every day and run as far as I could, something I had not done for 15 years.

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2. You win the door prize if you can name which witch Alyssa Milano played in my all-time favourite TV series, Charmed: A Thousand Years.

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3. One of a few comments on success by world leaders in this blog.

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4. You are a struggling entrepreneur and sometimes it feels like you are pushing a 3-ton boulder up a steep hill. Costs keep mounting and you are considering giving up. Well before you do, check out these 10 setbacks that Walt Disney had, some were financial nightmares that put him millions of dollars in the red:

A. Walt formed his first animation company in Kansas City in 1921. He made a deal with a distribution company in New York, in which he would ship them his cartoons and get paid six months down the road. He was forced to dissolve his company and at one point could not pay his rent and was surviving by eating dog food.

B. Walt created a mildly successful cartoon character in 1926 called Oswald the Rabbit. When he tried to negotiate with his distributor, Universal Studios, for better rates for each cartoon, he was informed that Universal had obtained ownership of the Oswald character and they had hired Disney’s artists out from under him.

C. When Walt tried to get MGM studios to distribute Mickey Mouse in 1927 he was told that the idea would never work– a giant mouse on the screen would terrify women.

D. The Three Little Pigs was rejected by distributors in 1933 because it only had four characters, it was felt at that time that cartoons should have as many figures on the screen as possible. It later became very successful and played at one theatre so long that the poster outside featured the pigs with long white beards. 

E. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was sneak previewed to college students in 1937 who left halfway during the film causing Disney great despair. It turned out the students had to leave early because of dorm curfew.

F. Pinocchio in 1940 became extra expensive because Walt shut down the production to make the puppet more sympathetic than the lying juvenile delinquent as presented in the original Carlo Collodi story. He also resurrected a minor character, an unnamed cricket who tried to tell Pinocchio the difference between right and wrong until the puppet killed him with the mallet. Excited by the development of Jiminy Cricket plus the revamped, misguided rather than rotten Pinocchio, Walt poured extra money into the film’s special effects and it ended up losing a million dollars in its first release.

G. For the premiere of Pinocchio Walt hired 11 midgets, dressed them up like the little puppet and put them on top of Radio City Music Hall in New York with a full day’s supply of food and wine. The idea was they would wave hello to the little children entering into the theatre. By the middle of the hot afternoon, there were 11 drunken naked midgets running around the top of the marquee, screaming obscenities at the crowd below. The most embarrassed people were the police who had to climb up ladders and take the little fellows off in pillowcases.

H.  Walt never lived to see Fantasia become a success. 1940 audiences were put off by its lack of a story. Also, the final scene, The Night On Bald Mountain sequence with the devil damning the souls of the dead, was considered unfit for children.

I. In 1942, Walt was in attendance for the premiere of Bambi. In the dramatic scene where Bambi’s mother died, Bambi was shown wandering through the meadow shouting,” Mother! Where are you, Mother?” A teenage girl seated in the balcony shouted out, ” Here I am Bambi!” The audience broke into laughter except for the black-faced Walt who concluded correctly that war-time was not the best time to release a film about the love-life of a deer. 

J. The sentimental Pollyanna in 1960 made Walt cry at the studio screening but failed at the box office. Walt concluded that the title was off-putting for young boys.  

Walt was human, he suffered through many fits of anger and depression through his many trials. Yet he learned from each setback and continued to take even bigger risks which combined with the wisdom that experiencing failure can provide, leading to fabulous financial rewards: Let It Go.

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5. With a nickname like Bum, NFL coach Oail Andrew Phillips could not but live by this credo.

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6. A leaders job is to learn from each interaction, there better be smarter people to learn from in your vicinity: Most Girls.

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7. Paul Allen and Bill Gates took some risks while founding Microsoft. One huge risk taken by Gates was that he dropped out of college to help create Microsoft, Gates could have stayed in college to learn more but instead, he took the risk to drop out and live his dream of creating Microsoft. Bill Gates also took the risk of starting his business on a vision, the vision of the personal computer being a useful tool on every office desk and in every home. When Gates was asked about these risks he said that he feels that he did not take a risk but instead he had a plan that if his business failed, he had enough money that it would not hurt him. As for dropping out of Harvard, he did not drop out, he took a formal leave of absence that left him tied to Harvard if things did not work out. He had a system in place if his goal did not work out.

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8. Systems like lots of hard work in place equal luck, A Ho: Harder, Better, Faster.

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9. Yes, that Donald Trump, our one, and only POTUS.

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10. And from another side of the world and an earlier era, another world leader has her say: Rap Battle, Hilary vs. Donald.

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11. I want a million dollars, I have a million dollars, are you willing?

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12. John Davison Rockefeller Sr. was an American oil industry business magnate, industrialist, and philanthropist. He is widely considered the wealthiest American of all time, and the richest person in modern history: I’m Rich.

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13. And this from the most respected world leader of all time.

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14. And this is not the way to do it: That’s Life.

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15. Marcus does not exist on Google, The more famous quote is by Vince Lombardi which begins the man at the top…

One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever heard goes something like this: If you want success, figure out the price, then pay it. It sounds trivial and obvious, but if you unpack the idea it has extraordinary power. I know a lot of people who wish they were rich or famous or otherwise fabulous. They wish they had yachts and servants and castles and they wish they could travel the world in their own private jets. But these are mere wishes. Few of these wishful people have decided to have any of the things they wish for. It’s a key difference, for once you decide, you take action. Wishing starts in the mind and generally stays there. When you decide to be successful in a big way, it means you acknowledge the price and you’re willing to pay it.

I like today’s playlist, it has deep songs and silly songs, a bit of fun and thought. It begins with Christina Perri, then a Disney tune. Hailee Steinfeld from my collection of pop divas up next, then Daft Punk. The silly track is a Rap Battle between Donald and Hilary. We end with Ada and Frank Sinatra: What If Life Is Not A Gamble?

Show Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included until next we meet, my dear friends,

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Photo by Jasmine Wallace Carter on Pexels.com

When Life Give You a Hundred Reasons To Cry.


I am about to do a course called the International Schools of Temple Arts Spiritual Sexual Shamanic Experience/Training and in the registration form, it asked what spiritual path or tradition do you follow or have followed, my answer was Shakya Tibetan Buddhism which I was deeply involved in for a period of 7 years. I thought that would be a great subject to write a blog on and did some online research as I gave away all of my Buddhist tomes several years ago.  I came across The Buddha in Your Mirror Practical Buddhism and the Search for Self by Woody Hochswender, Greg Martin, Ted Morino: Get It Here.

In it they write the following:

“If we were to apply these notions to the realm of human relations, certain insights would emerge. We would begin to realize that the lives of those in our immediate environment tend to mirror our own inner lives. Generally, if an individual finds other people unfriendly, it is often because he or she is provoking that reaction, one way or another. Similarly, if that person becomes friendlier, the people around that person will begin to react differently. An unusually kind and good-hearted person will tend to believe that others are the same. To a person possessed by lust for power, even the most selfless, benevolent actions of others will appear as cunning moves to gain power. When we cherish people with the same profound reverence as we would the Buddha, their Buddha nature functions to protect us. On the other hand, if we belittle or regard people with contempt, we will be disparaged in return, as though gazing into our own image reflected in a mirror. As much as we sometimes resist the idea, a smile and a few kind words can achieve near miracles by reducing hostility in many situations. There are people who can walk into a room and immediately lighten things up and lift everyone’s spirits. These are all illustrations of what Buddhism terms the principle of the oneness of life and its environment.”

So what has society said about the Oneness of Life, here are some of my favourites:

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1. What do you do to make yourself proud?

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2. How many times has your life unexpectedly changed in the last year, your clinging to supposed to causes anxiety around this: Club Controller.

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3. This is more my spiritual practice these days.

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4. Here is a way to bring your oneness in life to life: The Lie.

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5. At 64 this statement rings true for me.

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6. Two of my friends reached the end this weekend, they were both quite a bit younger than me, what was their what-ifs they hoped to fulfil before they were 64: Take Your Chance.

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7. Your Oneness is unique, never forget that:

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8. Oneness is not stopping and hoping things will change, It’s dancing with it: Singing In The Rain.

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9. I can feel it getting closer and closer.

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10. We cannot live forever, but the greats create something that liver long past their physical form. Nelson, Martin, Theresa, etc. etc. etc.: Someone Like You.

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11. Confucius’s principles have commonality with Chinese tradition and belief. He championed strong family loyalty, ancestor veneration, and respect of elders by their children and of husbands by their wives, recommending family as a basis for ideal government. He espoused the well-known principle “Do not do to others what you do not want to be done to yourself”, the Golden Rule. He is also a traditional deity in Daoism.

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12. You’ve got to fight for the right to Party.

 

 

 

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13. Your Oneness with Life will pay you back in kind.

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14. Speaking the truth Carol is: I’d Love to Change the World.

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15. But finally, remember that your Oneness in Life is yours, for you and that part of it is respecting others way of thinking.

Another tenet of Buddhism mention in the book is another link to an enriched life: “No one exists in isolation. We are connected to parents who conceived and raised us, to teachers who have educated us, and to friends who have encouraged us. We are also linked to people we have never met who harvest and distribute our food, manufacture our clothing, write the books that shape our thinking—in fact, we are connected to everyone whose efforts help hold together the fabric of society. There is no one in the world who has no connection to us.” So we have Oneness in Life and no one existing in isolation to tie together.

The playlist today begins in South Africa with Prince Kaybee and friends, then some spoken word from the Lie. Three different type of songs follow. They are Fun Factory, Gene Kelly and Adele. One of the classic anthems by the Beastie Boys is the penultimate track ending with a beautiful ballad by Jetta: When Life Gives You a Hundred reasons to Cry.

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

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Never tell people how to do Things, Tell them what to Do.


This list is from John C. Maxwell’s excellent book: The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Get It Here.

What would happen if a top expert with more than thirty years of leadership experience was willing to distil everything he had learned about leadership into a handful of life-changing principles just for you? It would change your life! John C. Maxwell has done exactly that in “21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership”. He has combined insights learned from his thirty-plus years of leadership successes and occasional mistakes with observations from the worlds of business, politics, sports, religion, and military conflict. The result is a revealing study of leadership delivered as only a communicator like Maxwell can. Here is the list:

THE 21 LAWS OF LEADERSHIP

1. The Law of the Lid. There’s a lid to your potential; it’s determined by your leadership ability. Therefore, expand your leadership capacity and expand your ability to impact the world.

2. The Law of Influence. As Maxwell says a number of times throughout the book, “The true measure of leadership is influence—nothing more, nothing less.”

3. The Law of Process. We can’t snap our fingers and become great leaders overnight. Maxwell tells us: “Leadership develops daily, not in a day.” 

4. The Law of Navigation. Steering the ship is relatively easy. Leaders chart the course—seeing where they want to go and charting the most effective course to get there.

5. The Law of Addition. Leaders serve. They focus on creating value for others. It’s not so much “What’s in it for me?” but “How can I serve?” That’s the law of addition.

6. The Law of Solid Ground. Maxwell tells us that trust is the foundation of leadership. We must stand on the solid ground of solid character—living with integrity, being trustworthy.

7. The Law of Respect. People “naturally follow leaders stronger than themselves.” We must cultivate our strength if we want people to respect us and be willing to follow our lead.

8. The Law of Intuition. As Emerson says, we must trust ourselves—“every heart vibrates to that iron string.” As a mentor of mine once said, “Trust yourself. Always.”

9. The Law of Magnetism. Who you ARE is who you will attract. Want to attract great people? BE GREAT. That’s the law of magnetism.

10. The Law of Connection. We must connect with others. Maxwell tells us, “Leaders touch a heart before they ask for a hand.”

11. The Law of Inner Circle. Our potential as leaders is determined by those closest to us. Whose in your inner circle?

12. The Law of Empowerment. You need to be confident enough to give power to others. Trust yourself and trust your team to crush it.

13. The Law of the Picture. People will do what they see. We need to create a “picture” of what awesome looks like which inspires people to follow our lead. Embody your ideals.

14. The Law of Buy-In. You have a great vision. Fantastic. (And essential.) But know this: People buy into YOU, the leader before they buy into the vision.

15. The Law of Victory. Victory. Leaders are FIERCELY committed to winning. Period. That relentless pursuit of victory is essential. (We’ll chat about this more as well.)

16. The Law of Big Mo. Mr Momentum. Is a very close friend of effective leaders. We need to create (and celebrate!) little wins—always remembering that progress is uber-powerful.

17. The Law of Priorities. It’s not enough to be busy. We need to be effective. Leaders take the time to properly line up their dominoes and focus on what’s most important.

18. The Law of Sacrifice. The higher you go, the more you need to be willing to give up. Leaders trade-off freedom with responsibility.

19. The Law of Timing. As Jim Collins says in Great By Choice, not all moments are created equal. Leaders know when to lean in and seize the moment.

20. The Law of Explosive Growth. Maxwell tells us about “leader’s math”—if you want to multiply your growth, create more LEADERS not followers.

21. The Law of Legacy. What do you want people to say at your funeral? Leaders keep this vision firmly in mind and dedicate their lives to its fulfilment. A quick inventory: Favourites? Strengths? Weaknesses?

“In a study of ninety leaders from a variety of fields, leadership experts Warren Bennis and Burt Nanus made a discovery about the relationship between growth and leadership: ‘It is the capacity to develop and improve their skills that distinguish leaders from their followers.’ Successful leaders are learners. And the learning process is ongoing, a result of self-discipline and perseverance. The goal each day must be to get a little better, to build on the previous day’s progress.

So how many of the Laws do you work on daily, here’s what the world says about Leadership:

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1. You can’t do it on your own, Go that way and it will work out is what the leader is there for.

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2. Master, Miss, Ms, Dr, Mrs, Mister, they are titles, being a leader is not: If You’re Out There.

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3. Actions not words, Leadership 101.

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4. Obviously, they are speaking about Donald Trumps leadership style, aren’t they: When I’m Gone.

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5. I don’t take up the Challenge every day, do you?

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6. Presence, Presence, Presence, Leadership: My Immortal.

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7. Mark Yarnell died in 2015, lauded as the Worlds greatest network Marketer, he was truly inspiring — “I’ve lived a “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah” life he said. “I’ve squeezed every ounce of joy out of every single day. It’s been an absolute blast!” And, he encouraged each of us to become the best possible version of ourselves while living a life of freedom.

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8. Even for your mistakes, that’s what real leadership is: Responsibility.

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9. Are you the former or the latter, Your Choice.

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10. Trying leadership on: Try.

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11. Word origin of ‘courage’: Middle Eastern & Old French – corage, heart, spirit  Latin cor, heart. Where we find our passion, In the heart.

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12. I recently came back in contact with Fiona, the woman who showed the leadership to get 13 disparate individuals to travel from Australia to Moscow to run a marathon in the name of ending world hunger, her leadership was inspirational at the time. It was the year before the Berlin Wall came down and communism ended in Russia: Fight Song. 

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13. Remember, it’s your actions that create the opportunities for others to become leaders too.

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14. I would change the middle quotes to Goes there own Way: Go Your Own Way.

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15. It’s OK to take walks, but it’s leadership that makes the difference after all.

As author Hans Finzel observed, ‘Leaders are paid to be dreamers. The higher you go in leadership, the more your work is about the future. At the same time, leaders are practical enough to know that vision without action achieves nothing. They make themselves responsible for helping their followers take action.” Great leaders are BOTH visionary *and* practical.

Today’s songs begin with John Legend, then we travel to the rap of Eminem. Rock takes over for the next three tracks with Evanescence, MxPx and Janis Joplin. It closes out with a very cute video of Rachell Platten and a whole lot of kids and finishes with a classic Fleetwood Mac number: Never tell people how to do Things, tell them what to Do

Namaste until next time, my dear friends.

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In a Cat’s eyes, All things belong to Cats.


I am part of a year-long training program called Warriors of Love where we declare a life essence and bring it into being powerful. I chose Intimate Belonging, my friend suggested I read Braving The Wilderness by Brene Brown: Get it Here.

I really enjoy Brene’s take on life, so I have been doing that this week, what really spoke to me was the following:

4 PRACTICES OF TRUE BELONGING

“What emerged from the responses to these questions were four elements of true belonging. These elements are situated in the reality of the world we live in today. The theories that emerge from this methodology are based on how we engage with the world in our everyday lives; they’re not hypothetical. This means you can’t develop a theory of true belonging without addressing how our increasingly polarised world shapes our lives and our experiences of connection and true belonging. I didn’t intend to write a book about belonging set against a backdrop of political and ideological chaos. But that’s not my call to make. My job is to be true to the data.

As you take a look at each of the four elements, you can see that each is a daily practice and feels like a paradox. They’re going to challenge us:

  1. People Are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In.
  2. Speak Truth to Bullshit. Be Civil.
  3. Hold Hands. With Strangers.
  4. Strong Back. Strong Front. Wild Heart.”

Imagine if we everyone did this every day in their lives, what a different place the planet would be. In fact, how have we looked at belonging over the decades, here are a few of my favourite takes at it, profoundly Brene influenced:

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1. Love and Belonging do not come out of a Mills and Boon episode, It comes from doing things that seem imperfect, that is vulnerable and real.

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2. One of my daily battles, between the intellectualism of my mind and the love I have in my heart for my community: Love Myself.

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3. Another Famous quoter named Brown. No relation, he was an African American baseball player born in the 1940’s.

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4. Not by someone named Brown, but the worlds most famous, Ms Anonymous, this is an excellent recipe for well being: We are all Connected.

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5. No change required, just genuinely being who you know you are.

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6. Who wired us to use our mind to feel a sense of belonging not our hearts, a lousy person: You’re Worth It.

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7. After 5 years of Mental Health episodes I woke up one day and made this decision, my life changed overnight.

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8. A prominent 20th-century Jewish rabbi who was raised in Germany expelled to Poland by the Nazis and fled to America, Heschel’s sister Esther was killed in a German bombing. His mother was murdered by the Nazis, and two other sisters, Gittel and Devorah, died in Nazi concentration camps. He never returned to Germany, Austria or Poland. He once wrote, “If I went to Poland or Germany, every stone, every tree would remind me of contempt, hatred, murder, of children killed, of mothers burned alive, of human beings asphyxiated.: No Tears Left to Cry.

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9. Self Love 101.

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10. Have to think about this one, I apparently have not felt it fully: Feels.

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11. Part of the four, Strong Back. Strong Front. Wild Heart.

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12. When we talk about these, get vulnerable, we realise that: We are all in This Together.

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13. If you feel like you belong where you are, why would there ever be a need for snobbery?

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14. Renee has ten questions in her about Renee on her website, they were asked by a garden gnome apparently. My personal favourite:  If you could have a room full of any one thing, what would it be: The most delicious food from all over the world. Seriously. I travel to eat. It may seem shortsighted to you, but I swear I would be much happier than the jackass with a roomful of gold: We Belong.

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15. How far can we take belonging? 

This box is a flub-up.
 

Aldo Leopold was an American author, philosopher, scientist, ecologist, forester, conservationist, and environmentalist. He was a professor at the University of Wisconsin and is best known for his book A Sand County Almanac (1949), which has sold more than two million copies. Leopold was influential in the development of modern environmental ethics and in the movement for wilderness conservation. His ethics of nature and wildlife preservation had a profound impact on the environmental movement, with his ecocentric or holistic ethics regarding land. He emphasised biodiversity and ecology and was a founder of the science of wildlife management. I think we forgot to take his advice.

Byron Katie has another great metaphor. She tells us that thinking the problem of belonging is “out there” is kinda like thinking the imperfect image on the movie screen is the problem. Nope. It’s the lint on the projector’s lens. Clean THAT off, and the movie screen of life is golden. “As you inquire into issues and turn judgments around, you come to see that every perceived problem appearing ‘out there’ is really nothing more than a misperception within your own thinking.”

A very bouncy playlist today. We begin with Hailee Steinfeld, then we do the connected dance. A positive number from Cimorelli, Arian Grande next, followed by Calvin Harris with a guest list of mega-stars. A boppy musical number from High School Musical, finishing up with an anthem from Pat Benatar: In a Cat’s eyes, All things belong to Cats.

Namaste until next time we meet, my dear friends:

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