What I don’t Know!!!


I have just spent three hours texting on the phone to my ex-partner, and it ended up in the usual Fuck Off. But during that I committed to writing a blog about what I didn’t know, a relative hard task because its about what I don’t know. Areas like how insecure I feel at times and how life confuses me. It seems the previous ones I wrote judging her personality based on my own defensiveness rather than any knowledge. I do not hold this to be totally true but apologise for causing her hurt in writing about her if it caused these feelings.

What do I feel insecure about? Many things: Insecure that I will fail in my new businesses, Insecure that I never feel my deepest emotions, Insecure that I will never respond to a woman in a way she feels worshiped, Insecure that I will always feel unlovable all my life and insecure that I will feel that if I let people get close to me they will reject me.

I am confused by how to meet a lovers needs, I am confused by fitting in, I am confused by feeling all the feels as my anger may get out of control, I am confused by what to do to be a good elder for my community, I am confused at the way the world is governed, it feels so wrong, I am confused by women’s intentions and I am confused by what it takes to find a woman who will love me for who I am.

So what has society said about insecurity and confusion, let’s take a walk down memory lane:

1. I’m not sure if I have as yet.

2. I have all three of these: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLmYZSu3NCc&list=PL6IfNZf-6l0gKdY4foPph_HTEm3nwrx8x&index=2

3. How many make your list?

4. They were for a while: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THeLVhU53ow&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=22

5. Boom!!!

6. I’m learning this big time, and the things about me that don’t work as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAfyFTzZDMM&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=28

7. This is why finding your perfect partner is so hard, because we all have these.

8. I haven’t as yet: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXXQLa-5n5w&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=31

9. Not an easy thing to do.

10. Intuition is from innocence, Insecurity from your darkest places: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocDlOD1Hw9k&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=27&bpctr=1600577394

11. Hit the pause button and turn it onto play.

12. When this happens in your life it is a grand declaration: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXoZLPSw8U8&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=26

13. Quite a broad recipe of circumstances of which insecurity is but one.

14. Not this takes something to meet on an equal plain: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYa1eI1hpDE&list=PLxXNIlld_SoIPdy-IW_b4ksQWqsfFO7e2&index=30

15. I plead guilty to this.

I wish to add some words by Jeanette LeBlanc, they relate to the writing of this:

Write the truth of yourself. As you know it. Right Now. In this exact moment and only this moment. Make your words sing with the hope of you , with the want of you, with the very blood and bones and guts of you Select the lines that speak your heart. Your sex. Your sacred. Spill yourself into this paragraph as if lives depend on it. Because your lives – every last one – do.

Today’s playlist is all pop diva’s except for the opening number. Gnash starts us off followed by Jess Glynne. Three of the biggies follow Christine Aguilera, Beyonce and Pink. Cobie Caillat is the penultimate diva and we finish with Taylor Swift: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJlQ3F9bKYrsm9HO0oD7BenIjEVeZoRGT

When the world is willing to recognise its insecurities and confusion we will be able to recognise that Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included will have a chance. My new tribe: Thriving People – People who wish to make a difference to humanity has this as its ethos, if you would like to join here is the link: https://bit.ly/2ERbjc9. Until we meet again my dear friends.

I’m Alone, I’m Alone, I’m Alone!!!


I can’t wait to read your fucking blog, here it is my beloved.

This is from a text I received yesterday. The same person who told me to fuck off and live my fantasy life and that’s she hates me, see my previous blog To Fuck Off, or Not. This was one of over 20 texts that started with my heart is breaking ending in the classic Fuck You posts. To me the above statement is a classic cry for help. I have worked out that my friend has three unique identities: The first being the Wise, Insightful, Compassionate, Sensual one. The second being the doubting Thomas one, this won’t work out which still contains some of the former, and the third, the cruel, sadistic Fuck You one who will say anything to hurt you, including you should kill yourself.

Am I being sadistic staying in communication with her, or Am I still in love with her. When I look into my heart, it is the latter. I don’t know how to fall out of love in a week and a bit, which she seems to have been able to achieve. So now we are both alone per say still talking to each other via text. So what does the world say about being alone, lets walk down that street:

1. I am slowly learning this, too soon, although we are in COVID stage 4 Lock-down in Melbourne, Australia.

2. You can offer this, but when they have made the decision to end it, its over, but in ours there seems to be residue: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzSgxvvTWvA

3. For me that I prefer a partner.

4. I sense I will eventually do this again:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLQl3WQQoQ0&list=PLgP_WFDJWjxRBAnIeUupZ-XHAspFBJZ0i

5. Thats what my sister is saying to me about my current situation.

6. The joy of the previous months with my friend have ruined this for me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSDgHBxUbVQ&list=PLgP_WFDJWjxRBAnIeUupZ-XHAspFBJZ0i&index=3

7. Not Yet, for me.

8. That is what crushes your heart: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2U0Ivkn2Ds&list=

9. Peace Out.

10. I so miss this, I am getting teary typing these words: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGorjBVag0I

11. It goes back to my early childhood, being cared for and abandoned by my mum in the first three months of my life.

12. I have been told by many friends I should be doung this, not talking to her. My heart does not want to hear it:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBumgq5yVrA&list=PLgP_WFDJWjxRBAnIeUupZ-XHAspFBJZ0i

13. Nothing, not even that person.

14. I do this so I don’t have to feel so sad: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhcc1KQlCS4&list=PLgP_WFDJWjxRBAnIeUupZ-XHAspFBJZ0i&index=9

15. This is for my friend, a woman of faith.

So when life gets stressful and you feel like you’re losing your emotional balance, use one or more of these simple tricks to help you relax your mind and recenter yourself in an instant:

1.Wash your hands and face, annd brush your teeth.

2. Change your socks

3. Call a close friend.

4. Stretch.

5. Go outdoors

6. Take a light exercise break.

7. Dress to feel your best.

8.Listen to your favourite music.

9. Take a few deep,, controlled breaths.

10. Clear your stuffed nose.

11. Cook a good meal.

12. Walk away from energy vampires.

13. Complete an important piece of unfinished business.

14. Work in something that is meaningful for you.

15. Assist someone in need.

16. Think about your latest or (greatest success).

17. Act like today is already an awesome day

18. Notice what’s right.

Take a moment to acknowledge how far you’ve come.

Today’s playlist is dripping with Pop divas: We begin with Beyonce followed by Adele, Ed Sheeran and Christine Aguilera. We travel back in time for Leonard Cohen classic and end with Passenger and Andra: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJlQ3F9bKYrsGy-xwtyPoagX95P3KDfEs

Still haven’t worked out the links issue, My mission is not to be alone, it is to have 1,000,000 state they will live from the ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included, you can join our tribe here; https://www.facebook.com/groups/1126100227764949. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

Are you present , or in your head?


I recently invited a dear friend over for dinner, the second person besides my family I have had in my home in 6 and a half years. To say  I was excited is an understatement and I was thinking about how I could make the night perfect. That was where I made my blunder, I was in my head about it most of the night and not very present at all. Surprisingly my friend did not say anything directly at the time but let me know later that I had been mostly not present for her the whole time.

I have spent most of my adult life trying to work things out in my head and now have the opportunity to do it from and open up my heart. When she asks me what are you feeling I have to fight the urge to look in my head for the answer and feel into my heart also not to tell a story from my past or speculate on the future, but to be in the present or as Eckhart Tolle tells us, The Power of Now. It is a journey that we have agreed to take together to deepen our friendship.

Friendship, what has the universe said about that over the years, lets have a look:

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1. Christie Brinkley is an American model, actress, and entrepreneur. Brinkley gained worldwide fame with her appearances in the late 1970s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issues, ultimately appearing on an unprecedented three consecutive covers starting in 1979. 

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2. The letters IM drop out of your life when everything becomes possible: Signed, Sealed, Delivered.

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3. They exist in that part of your heart that says, we will always be friends.

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4. Do you wait?: A Song for You.

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5. One is the most powerful number.

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6. True friends are cemented together at the heart: That’s What Friends are For.

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7. These are the people who where 5 years apart feels like 5 minutes when you meet.

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8. They light the way and you need to no longer be afraid of the dark: I will Always Love You.

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9. The Bible has some good stuff in it.

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10. I have several of the atter family in my life, I love them: We are Family.

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11. And you must keep proving it day to day if the friendship is to grow.

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12. Disturb them with the question, what are you feeling?: Endless Love.

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13. Like I will honour and love you, just as strong a promise.

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14. My heart shuddered reading this one: Baby Please Don’t Go.

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15. And for our final lesson today, the most profound statement of the blog, Hahaha.

So I am finishing this at 10.50 pm at night because I have spent many hours deepening our friendship over the past two days. It was joyous, confronting and loving and all the things in between. is it worth it, Fuck Yes!!!

The playlist tonight is dedicated to the BLM movement. Firstly Stevie Wonder leads off, following by the little known vocal genius Donny Hathaway. Dionne Warwick and her friends then hit the stage, handing it over to Whitney Houston. Chic and Sister Sledge then occupy the stage for a while, making way for Luther Vandross and Mariah Carey and we finish with a rocking tune by Muddy Waters and the Stones: Are you Present or in Your Head?

How changing is this journey of deep friendship I am taking? I intend that it transform my relationship to what friendship means and that my heart will be truly opened for the first time in my life. We have just begun but I am so more in touch with my world ethos of Love and Respect for all, Everyone Included. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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P.S. This one is for you, Amy.

Are you Enough?


How often have you asked yourself this question? They say that you make your prime decision about your life by the age of seven years old, then spend the rest of your life surviving it via therapy or being in the winner’s circle.

Over to my friend Marc Chernoff to provide a list that will support us in this area. It is called 12 choices your future self will thank you for:

When life pushes you over, stand up and push back even harder, when there is a fork in the road and choices to make, make the ones your future self will thank you for:

1. Choosing you – The most exhausting activity is pretending to be who you know you aren’t.

2. Appreciating what you have – Sometimes, when you make the most out of what you have, it turns out to be a lot more than you ever imagined.

3. Believing in yourself and your dreams – Believe in you. Listen to your soul.

4, Being positive – You can’t live a positive life with a negative attitude.

5. Taking action – The happiest and most successful people are usually those who have broken the chains of procrastination.

6. Letting Go – The biggest step in changing the world around you is to change the world within you.

7. Picking yourself back up – Sometimes when things go wrong it’s because they would have turned out worse if they had gone right.

8. Ignoring negative people – You are not a rug; some people may try to walk all over you, but you don’t have to lie there and take it.

9. Staying in touch with close friends and family – There comes a time in life you’ll have to leave everything behind for a while and start something new, but never forget the people who stood by your side.

10. Making time for fun – Fun is way underrated.

11. Spreading Love and Kindness – The happiness surrounding you is greatly affected by the choices you make every day.

12. Being the change you want to see in the world – Don’t tell others how to live; live and let them watch you.

So what has the human race said about being enough, let’s have a look

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1. Three powerful statements on self love there.

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2. Love the last line: Never Stop.

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3. Time to break down the walls.

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4. And to stop pretending: Worth It.

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5. Read the handwriting.

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6. Having these in your heart definitely brings out the strength in you: You Say.

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7. What a great name: Badass Warrior Queen.

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8. I love memes with hearts in them: Fight Song.

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9. Some powerful I statements here.

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10. Some great words from our curly-haired genius: Somewhere over the Rainbow.

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11. What are your personal avatars?

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12. All hail Brene: Love Myself.

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13. That why all the good books say self-love first and foremost.

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14. These boots are made for walking: Boots.

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15. And the last offering comes from the cardigan-wearing one, Eckhart Tolle reminding us of the treasure we all have within:

So choose to spread love to one person a day, beginning with yourself would be a grand idea. Imagine the amount of happiness you can spread in a lifetime, day by day.

Today on the playlist we have an all-women lineup. We have something for the young and not so young. Two bands unknown to me start us off. The Brand New Heavies and Fifth Harmony, both have millions of followers. Lauren Daigle and Rachel Platten belt out a couple of anthems next. Then back in time to Judy Garland, the penultimate number is from Hailee Steinfeld and we finish with Nancy Sinatra: Are You Enough?

This actually is take two of this blog, I got one quote from the end and poof, it disappeared. But I had to mention my ethos, Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included and my ever-growing Facebook group calledInterculturalism. We would love you to join us to spread love and respect around the planet.

Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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She Births New Beginnings!!!


Crewed on an event called Embody your Full Power as a Man last night. It’s an introduction to a body of work called Dancing Eros for Men. Surprisingly you do not journey with your male archetypes but with those of the sacred feminine: The archetypes are the Maiden, the Wild Woman, the Priestess, the Erotic Mother and the Slut and they live in all of us in their own unique way: Dancing Eros.

I began the journey in June 2018 with some trepidation as I looked out over the group of men gathered in the room the first night as to what a slightly over the hill 63-year-old would get out of such a program and would I have to dance like a slut in front of 20 other men, not really my bag. This what I wrote when requested to do a testimonial for the intro last night: The intimacy I created with the group of men I journeyed with transmuted to everyone in my life: Lovers, Brothers, Sisters, Parents, Workmates, Strangers in the Streets, see you at the intro. It was like the spirit of humanity sat in that room with me over the eight nights and days we spent together.

My friend Marc Chernoff has created a list which sums up pretty well what I got out of it:

A Silhouette of a human being stands before you. Perhaps a friend. Perhaps a lover. Perhaps a perfect stranger. They need you to connect with them. They need you to share this moment.

They need you to:

1. They need you to smile without hesitation.

2. Give without expectation.

3. Comfort without lying.

4. Guide without misleading.

5. Forgive without resentment.

6. Rest without judgement.

7. Notice without critiquing.

8. Appreciate without comparing.

9. Listen without interruption.

10. Question without objection.

11. Challenge without mocking.

12. Consider without doubting.

13. Discuss without criticizing.

So what have we said about our sacred feminine spirit over the centuries, here are some of the ways we expressed it:

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1. As children, we rely on what our heart says to us to be in the world, as our brain kicks in, we forget the purity of this.

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2. Just Man up is such a demeaning tool to dissect our full personality: On a Roll.

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3. You need to do the work.

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4. CARLOS ANDRÉS GÓMEZ is a Colombian American poet, speaker, actor, and author of Hijito, selected by Eduardo C. Corral as the winner of the 2018 Broken River Prize and a #1 SPD bestseller, and the memoir Man Up: Reimagining Modern Manhood, released by Penguin Random House: We’ve Only Just Begun.

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5. To take on a transformational shift like Dancing Eros, you need a fair bit of this.

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6. We need to have them in a healthy balance: Both Sides Now.

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7. From the 18th Century. Charlotte Brontë was an English novelist and poet, the eldest of the three Brontë sisters who survived into adulthood and whose novels became classics of English literature.

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8. Values can be buried with you and remembered, Ferrari’s can’t: I Gotta Feeling.

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9. French-born fashionista Rykiel was also a writer. She wrote several books about fashion, a collection of children’s stories, magazine columns and an epistolary novel with Régine Desforges. Her first book Et Je La Voudrais Nue (I Would Like Her Naked) was published in 1979. In 2012, she co-authored N’oubliez pas que je joue (Don’t forget it’s a game) with journalist Judith Perrignon. 

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10. This is why it was an honour to be part of the crew who gave the opportunity to 50 men to transform their lives: The Power of Love.

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11. Time to walk the Inner path.

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12. You can dance if you want to, It’s time: I Wanna Dance with Somebody.

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13. Or that suffering may take you to a Dancing Eros for Men intro in Collingwood.

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14. Listening deeply is part of the deal: Listen to The Earth.

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15. What others would you add?

In the end, what all people want deep down is the need for you to be uniquely you – just the way you are, and they need you to respect them – just the way they are.  This so fits in with my world ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included.

The playlist contains some of the classic female voices of all time: Unknown pop diva Ashley O begins the journey. Karen Carpenter and Joni Mitchell are the first of our female vocal legends. We return to this century with The Black Eyed Peas before being entranced by Celine Dion and Whitney Houston. We finish with some beats from Listen to the Earth: She Births New Beginnings.

Remember to sign up to receive these blogs in your inbox on the righthand side of my homepage at http://www.rodwill1707.com. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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First You Dream, Then You Do!!!


Had a busy weekend, attended a potluck 40th Friday evening, a commitment ceremony Saturday, and a Warrior of Love training day Sunday. This gave me a lot to choose from to write about. I have chosen to write about the growth conversation I had with a vital young thing at the potluck. She seemed to just be reaching out to begin her growth adventure but was not sure what direction to take. I gave her some of my worldly advice and left her with that. I suggested that life was about taking chances and seeing what worked out for her.

My friend Marc says the following: Life is about taking chances. It’s about doing something you initially thought you could never do. It’s about being a little bit crazy. following your heart, and not worrying about every detail of what everyone else thinks. And above all, it’s about learning to love who you are and what you have.

Here are his 12 things to start caring about on your journey:

  1. Start caring about your own happiness – It’s important to make people happy, but you have to start with yourself.
  2. Start caring about your goals and dreams – If you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind goes when it wanders.
  3. Start caring about how you invest your time every day – There might not be a tomorrow, not for everyone.
  4. Start caring about how you think and what you think about – In your quiet moments, what do you think about?
  5. Start caring about how you treat yourself – Your relationship with yourself is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have.
  6. Start caring about how you treat others – Live so that when the people around you think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.
  7. Start caring about how others treat you – Choose your relationships wisely.
  8. Start caring about your health – Exercise to be fit, not skinny.
  9. Start caring about your education and personal growth – Achieving higher consciousness comes from your commitment to personal growth.
  10. Start caring about doing the best YOU can – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.
  11. Start caring about all the wonderful things you have right now – Learn to appreciate the things you have before time forces you to appreciate the things you once had.
  12. Start caring about this moment we call ‘life’ – This moment is your life, don’t miss it.

So what have people said about their growth paths over the centuries, lets have a look:

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1. This is when fear is a positive in your life.

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2. Boats are not built to stay in safe harbours, neither are you: Around The World.

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3. Audrey was much more than just a great actress, In December 1992, she received the Presidential Medal of Freedom in recognition of her work as a UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador.

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4. Best known for his hierarchy of needs, Abraham Maslow calls out for us to choose growth and overcoming fear by moving forward again and again: Ours.

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5. The knot explains a lot.

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6. Will people come on aboard your form of contagious?: Fight Song.

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7. We go back to the 18th Century for this powerful insight from the third POTUS.

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8. How is your journey unfolding, don’t give your dreams up: Don’t Stop Believing.

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9. A great word that hangs out with I’m Possible.

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10. There are several quotes that say this, Boom!: To Live And Die In LA.

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11. Its an inner and outer journey.

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12. You can’t stay there anymore: Time to Grow.

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13. Breathwork is very supportive on the journey I have found.

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14. Our second POTUS for today’s blog: Happy Birthday, Mr President.

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15. And for our final lesson, we hear from one of the world’s most powerful women . Ginni Rometty’s tenure as IBM’s CEO has been marked by noteworthy awards, including by Bloomberg’s 50 Most Influential People in the World, Fortune’s “50 Most Powerful Women in Business”, Times 20 Most Important People in Tech and Forbes’ America’s Top 50 Women In Tech.

Unfortunately, sometimes, just before you take your first step on the journey to pursue your dreams, people around you, even the ones who deeply care for you, will give you awful advice. It’s not because they have evil intentions. It’s because they don’t understand the big picture – what your dreams, passions and life goals mean to you. They don’t understand that, to you, the reward is worth the risk. Enjoy the Journey.

So as Steve Jobs said ” Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living within the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Today’s playlist features rock bands, pop divas and rap stars. We begin with The Red Hot Chilli Peppers, then Taylor Swift and her fellow pop diva Rachel Platten. Journey next then over to rap land with Tupac and Lemar. We finish with Marilyn Monroe: First You Dream, Then You Do.

I was checking my stats recently, I spread my ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included across 128 countries last year. I’m on a strong growth pattern to having it being the world paradigm. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Never Accept The Definition of Life From Others!!!


I am going through a 21-day process called Integrity and the Power of Habit via the Warriors of Love year-long training program I am in. Each week has a list of core principles, for week one they are as follows in the area of Integrity :

  1. Live from Embodies Essence.
  2. The Power of Declaration from Essence.
  3. Integrity – Do what you say you will do.
  4. With Integrity Comes Power.
  5. Write It Down – Put it in time.
  6. When Integrity falls out, we create distance.

For each of us, these principles will bring up different shadows where we could improve said integrity. I immediately noticed for me it was how I spend my mornings. I have watched ABC News Breakfast for at least an hour for the past five years. My friend Brian Johnson from Optimize, the best ten dollars you can spend on the internet: The link to Brian’s World. states that we are at our most refreshed first thing in the mornings . after we have rested our body.

So the TV is now turned off and I go for a half-hour walk wearing my absolutely fantastic Beats Bluetooth headphones listening to my morning meditation.

What do others say about the morning and how empowering it is when used to its full benefits, let’s have a look.

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1. My Tibetan Buddhist school referred to him as Shakyamuni Buddha. This is about living in the present.

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2. One is not the loneliest number sometimes: One.

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3. A bit out of integrity with the spelling but a great message.

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4. My life ethos is Love and Respect for all, Everyone Included so I cannot agree with this: One Love.

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5. Celebrations, Challenges and Commitments are what we look at in the group.

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6. Word Magic: Try.

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7. And hopefully we all have one of these, and if we don’t, they are out there, you just have not found each other yet.

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8. Refer to the Blog title…: Born This Way.

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9. Is this a tautology, even if it’s not, it’s clever.

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10. From the worlds most popular philosopher, Ms Unknown, the reason why early to bed, early to rise is such a great idea: Live It Up.

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11. From the early and mid-1800s, Ralph speaks of the benefits the mornings offer.

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12. Life is a Blessing, a powerful mantra to live life by: Blessed We Are.

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13. And is all across the planet.

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14. Cute cat photo of the blog: Moving On Up.

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15. And for our final lesson, there are 7 billion different ways to relate to these principles.

Today’s list from Marc and Angel Chernoff is entitled: 10 WAYS Successful people START Their Mornings:

  1. Get an Early Start.
  2. Clarify and Review Your Priorities.
  3. Prune any nonessential commitments for the day.
  4. Exercise.
  5. Eat a Healthy Breakfast.
  6. Kiss your partner good-bye.
  7. Practice 15 minutes of positive visualisation.
  8. Eat That Frog.
  9. Connect with the Right People.
  10. Stay Informed.

Today’s playlist educated me, I did not know that one of Australia’s musical icons went as far back as the sixties, but there you go. We begin with John Farnham and Bob Marley from the last century. Pink and Lady Gaga returns us to this one. Another Australian number one from Mental As Anything. Then a fantastic singalong from Peia, and we complete with some R and B from M People: Never Accept The Definition of Life From Others!!!

So here is to walking to my nearby lake in Rezza, aka Reservoir each morning. Showing myself Love and Respect For All, Everybody Included. Remember if you enjoy the subject matter of my blog, sign up on the right-hand side on the homepage. Until next time we meet, my dear friends.

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There Is No House Like The House Of Belonging!!!


We had a training day for my Warriors of Love yeat long training program yesterday, that’s Sunday for the rest of my readers who don’t live in Australia. Embarrassingly due to lack of sleep, I fell asleep twice in the theoretical section of the day. But towards the end of the day, we did an amazing exercise on Belonging – as in what was our belief’s that had us not fully belong in a group of over 30 people and what did we think was the core belief of the group that prevented it.

There was an amazing range of reasons offered, some people spoke easily, others did not comment at all. For myself, my bugbear “If they truly knew how unlovable I was they would hate me” was my offering. Others covered I am afraid to shine because I will be cut off at the knees too, I can’t bring all part of my life here. They were as many and varied and unique as the diverse individuals in the group.

When we moved on to the group ethos it tied into fear of what would our lives be like if we actually achieved this. The thought crossed my mind that my worrisome and sometimes anxious identity would have to die. So what has the world said about belonging, what stops or creates a sense of community, let’s have a look:

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1. Who else could we start this with but a classic Brene Brown quote?

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2. As children, we will try anything because everything is a new experience, and we belong to them all: Adventure of a Lifetime. 

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3. British film director Anthony Minghella powerfully states the control these thoughts have over us.

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4. I totally get where actor James Caan is coming with this statement: Hey Ho.

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5. Not just students: children, mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, ex-lovers, etc. etc.

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 6. I think William should have called them the superpowers: Superpower.

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7. Wonder (curiosity), self-discovery, problem-solving, interaction, exploration, and play—that’s what Bev Bos taught me. Reading and writing come after these approaches to learning are established. Children learn best when they can make their own choices and set their own goals.

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8. The entertainment industry is featuring heavily in this blog, musician Tom Petty directs us towards our freedom spot: Freedom.

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9. That’s how powerful your story is – speak kindly to yourself.

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10. More Brene, Self Love 101: Love Myself.

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11. And from outside Western civilization comes proof this is a worldwide search.

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12. Being the daughter of famous parents may have something to do with this quote, Gail’s mother was Lena Horne: Stormy Weather.

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13. Belonging has many different meanings.

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14. Being the best or most extreme example of its kind. “the ultimate accolade”: Ultimate.

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15. The final lesson for today is this image because I loved it so much.

I like adding one of my friends Marc and Angel Chernoff, who wrote 1000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently lists at the end of my blogs, I have found them extremely useful on my healing journey. Todays is entitled 10 TIMELESS lessons from a Life Well Lived:

  1. Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed.’
  2. Be a student of Life every day.
  3. Experience is the Best Teacher.
  4. Your Choice, Your Actions, Your Life.
  5. No one is “too busy.” It’s all about priorities.
  6. Be patient and tough. Someday this pain will be useful to you.
  7. It’s usually better to be kind than right.
  8. You can become a magnet for good things by wishing everyone well.
  9. Only you are in charge of your attitude.
  10. Satisfaction is not always the fulfilment of what you want.

Today’s playlist features Rock, Rap and Pop Diva’s. We begin with the rock of Coldplay and the Lumineers. Beyonce and Hailee Steinfeld are split by a classic Woodstock anthem from Richie Havens. The penultimate song returns to the time of World War Two from Lena Horne and we finish with a grungey rap number from Denzel Curry: There Is No House Like the House of Belonging!!!

I was thinking as we were standing in the completion circle of our Belonging process that if we achieve this it would be possible for the whole planet to come from Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included, my heart shuddered. Remember if you enjoy reading my musings you can sign up to receive them on the right-hand side of my home page. Until we meet again on the airwaves, my dear friends.

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F.L.Y. – First Love Yourself!!


I have begun writing my blogs about how I feel about things in my life, I don’t want to write about having a cold or a dodgy knee so that leaves self-love. I went and saw my mentor Arion for my weekly session and as always he asked me what did I want to discuss. I said I would like to discuss why I am finding it hard to feel my ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included throughout my body.

He replied, but that is who you are for your friends and family. We went through a list of people and places I am a part of, he asked me if I asked them was I an example of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included what would they say about me, I had to admit that they would probably say I was. So the next question was if 99 people were saying this about me that why was I not getting the message, this is when the old warhorse lack of self-love raised itself through my body.

It’s interesting the decisions we make as young children, I don’t remember coming to don’t allow yourself to be loved, because you will have to leave from moving a lot but at times it controls me. Loaded up with some breathwork exercises, I headed to the local library to sit in the rooftop garden and contemplate the session. It made me think what have the mystics and soothsayers said about self-love over the decades, here are some of them:

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1. Lending his popular voice to various topics, Steve’s books, quotes, videos, and memes have become a social media sensation; being shared by millions across the globe in more than 25 languages.

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2. I’m a step from this, I feel: Conceited.

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3. I forgot the last line on my tattoo.

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4. As is each of us: Irreplaceable.

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5. Dodinsky’s home page has been hacked by a casino site, Love this quote.

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6. Makes me think of that civil war statement, Rebel Yell: Rebel Yell.

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7. Has to be some Brene in the mix.

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8. Somewhere, Everywhere: Somewhere Over The Rainbow.

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9. Marvel comics know this relates to both women and men.

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10. Some of the really tough work, mirror work: I’m Still Standing.

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11. Not surprisingly I became Community Manager of a company called Collective Potential.

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12. This is because you actually have boundaries when you love yourself: Emotional Boundaries are Important.

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13. Perfection, the ultimate booby prize.

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14. Supposedly they are already there: Loving You.

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15. The final lesson, don’t devalue yourself.

Writing this has made me feel a lot better, time to look at the evidence, not listen to identity.

There are two great yells in the playlist today, and we may double the views of the young woman who has been viewed a mere 35 times. We begin with rap diva Remy Ma, then four icons from totally different era follow. Beyonce, Billy Idol, Ariana Grande and Elton John make them up. Then the little known Nadia Nelson and we finish with a classic from the 1970s by Minnie Riperton: F.L.Y. – First Love Yourself

I’m learning to include myself in Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included. Until we meet again my dear friends.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

 

 

Someone Asked If I Knew You?


As I said in my last blog I turned 65 last week, on Sunday I attended a memorial service for a friend who will not. He was just 42 and one of the most vibrant people on the planet. He was a DJ, an environmentalist, a teacher and a beautiful man. He was taken by the big C, a condition that does not listen to reason.

In the weeks before his passing rumours spread of him passing and people began to write eulogies. He had not, so I began listening to his MixCloud sets. I was listening to one of these when posts began appearing from his nearest and dearest that he had actually passed. At this moment I received a download from him. It was just four words: Get On With It. You cannot assume you will be here to fulfil your passions and dreams next year, Get on with It.

Today an article from my friends Marc and Angel Chernoff titled 25 Things You Should Never Stop Doing for Yourself came through my news feed, I thought they were relevant:

  1. Never stop stretching and improving yourself.
  2. Never stop listening to your own inner voice.
  3. Never stop walking comfortably in your own shoes.
  4. Never stop working through your fears.
  5. Never stop being a little unrealistic.
  6. Never stop doing what needs to be done.
  7. Never stop embracing your struggles.
  8. Never stop being willing to make mistakes.
  9. Never stop getting back up.
  10. Never stop making the best of it.
  11. Never stop ignoring the naysayers.
  12. Never stop taking small steps forward.
  13. Never stop giving yourself a chance to soar to new heights.
  14. Never stop smiling.
  15. Never stop thinking positive.
  16. Never stop laughing at yourself and your life situations.
  17. Never stop appreciating the life you’re living right now.
  18. Never stop indulging in life’s little daily joys.
  19. Never stop spreading your kindness.
  20. Never stop giving what you can.
  21. Never stop giving your important relationships a fair chance.
  22. Never stop doing little things for your own happiness.
  23. Never stop opening your mind to new perspectives.
  24. Never stop evolving.
  25. Never stop writing your own story, your own way.

My friend did most of these, especially number 21, never stop giving your important relationships a chance. So how does society give friendships a chance, here are a selection of that is said about them:

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  1. Several hundred people attended the memorial for my friend. quite a few travelled from interstate, I think this supports the above statement.

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2. Through a lengthy friendship, all these and more situations arise: Black Coffee.

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3. When the physical sails off, we have the memories in our heart.

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4. As you get older and they pull down the structures of your past, it is the people that you remember who were there with you: That’s What Friends Are For.

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5. I met one of my dearest friends pretending to be a tree at a party in a flat in Carlton in the ’70s when we swayed into each other too vigorously. 

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6. The people who you can sit with next to a river for hours and not a word needs to be spoken, Fuck Yes: Down by the River.

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7. They’re the ones wearing the I’m with them tee shirts.

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8. Ama Ata Aidoonée Christina Ama Aidoo (born 23 March 1942) is a Ghanaian author, poet, playwright and academic. She was the Minister of Education under the Jerry Rawlings administration. In 2000, she established the Mbaasem Foundation to promote and support the work of African women writers because she realised it was important that all people received an education, not just the elite, She has portrayed the role of African women in contemporary society. She has opined that the idea of nationalism has been deployed by recent leaders as a means of keeping people oppressed. She has criticized those literate Africans who profess to love their country but are seduced away by the benefits of the developed world. She believes in a distinctly African identity, which she views from a female perspective: I am Woman.

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9. I think we are best at this as children.

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10. What does the F stand for: It Ain’t What You Do.

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11. There are 51 meanings for the acronym BFF, this could be for two of them: Best Friends Forever or Best Fan Forever.

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12. My friend was so good at this. Written in the 1930s or 1940s, still so relevant today: Humble and Kind.

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13. Until they are not if you have the thought I wonder how they are, time to reach out.

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14. From her Matched Trilogy of teenage novels comes this beautiful quote by author Ally Condie: Tangled Up In You.

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15. And we finish our lesson for today with the eating of buns.

We ended the ceremony with a drumming ceremony in a circle, as it lifted in energy, I could imagine our friend saying fuck this, and jumping into the middle and dancing his heart out. Farewell from the physical world, our dear friend, the eternal will hold you well as will our hearts.

The playlist for today is not really representative of the music our friend loved, but maybe it is as he loved all music. It begins with All Saints. Then drops back a century to Dionne Warwick, a long guitar solo by Neil Young, Helen Reddy and Bananarama. The penultimate track goes country by Tim Mcgraw as does the final number from Aaron Lewis: Someone Asked If I Knew You.

It took me two days to write this, it normally takes two hours. My friend lived Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. We will miss you, dear friend.

Until we meet again my dear friends, I love you.

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