Stand Up Straight and Realise Who You Are!!!


The title of this blog is part of a Maya Angelo quote, the final line is that you tower over your circumstances. Do you let adversities stop you in life? Here are some questions to make you think about it:

1. What stands between you and happiness.

2. Are you holding onto something you need to let go?

3. Decisions are being made right now. The question is, are you Making them yourself or are you letting others make them for you?

4. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?

5. What is the biggest challenge you face now?

6. If the average life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

7. What’s something that happened to you that made you stronger?

8. What is worth the pain?

9. Are you aware someone has it worse than you?

10. What’s missing in your life?

One of my adversities is my families pre-edification to suffer from gout. I have not had it for one and a half years and I was asked about it by my naturopath two days ago, and yesterday I woke up with it. Ouch, this lies in the do not push your luck arena.

So what does life say about adversity, here are a few quotes that express it rather well:

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1. With her two most prominent roles challenging gender stereotypes and norms, The New York Times said Mary Tyler Moore’s “performances on [The Mary Tyler Moore Show and The Dick Van Dyke Show] helped define a new vision of American womanhood.” The Guardian said “her outwardly bubbly personality and trademark broad, toothy smile disguised an inner fragility that appealed to an audience facing the new trials of modern-day existence.

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2. Best known to the general public for his mass-energy equivalence formula E = Mc squared, which has been dubbed “the world’s most famous equation, from the misogynistic earlier part of the Twentieth century, I’m sure this relates to men and women: We R Who We R.

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3. All butterflies have “complete metamorphosis.” To grow into an adult they go through 4 stages: egg, larva, pupa and adult. Each stage has a different goal – for instance, caterpillars need to eat a lot, and adults need to reproduce.

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4. I suggest looking at the different styles of the last two POTUS’s to understand this quote: Don’t Give Up.

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5. Barbara De Angelis is an American relationship consultant, lecturer and author, TV personality, relationship, personal growth adviser and spiritual teacher. Her infomercial “Making Love Work” won an award as Best Infomercial of 1994.

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6. What can you do now you couldn’t last year? That’s called overcoming adversity: Look What You Made Me Do.

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7. From the man who went through his and freed a country.

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8. Simply for the Image: Sing For The Moment.

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9. Turn around, overcoming adversity happens the other way.

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10. Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee: Black Superman.

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11. One of the ways to overcome adversity quickly is to learn the art of acceptance.

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12. Marty Rubin, a South Florida gay activist, author and journalist,  Mr. Rubin died after a struggle with AIDS. He was 64: Live It Up.

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13. Six powerful words.

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14. I love the zen of Japanese philosophy: Walking on the Moon.

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15. For your final lesson, remember flowers grow between cracks in the footpath.

So, a few words on adversity to finish; You never know how really strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

Today’s playlist contains some Sesame Street, a daggy song, an Aussie classic and two pop divas, surprise, surprise. We begin with Kesha, then Bruno Mars. Pop diva Taylor Swift follows, Eminem raps a tune out next. The ode to the Black Superman by Johny Wakelin brings the seriousness down a bit. Back to Australia for Mental as Anything and we complete with British supergroup The Police: Stand Up Straight and Realise Who You Are!!!

So when adversity arises in my life, I return to my ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included and get back on track. P.S. I found some joint cream I brought several years ago, It works. Until we meet again my dear friends.

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No, I don’t think I will kiss You!!!


Today I am going to write about friendship, in particular, a friendship I have formed with two of my English student, Jule and Xue Li. They are both Chinese mothers who are in Australia supporting their children through their education.

I must admit I did not have any Chinese friends before meeting these two wonderful women and really knew very little about everyday Chinese culture, perhaps the Great Wall of China was visible from space and that there are 2 billion Chinese and that is a lot of people.

Since then I have learnt of their deep respect for educators, that they do not have snags at Chinese BBQ’s and they include you in their circle of friends. Here is a photo that was taken on Monday at the National Gallery of Victoria on an excursion to a Japanese fashion exhibition they organised instead of having English lessons:

julie,xue li and me.

They make me smile with their antics, they met each other at English classes, are from totally different areas of China and have different cultural backgrounds. Here is a quite long list my friend Marc Chernoff wrote about how to make people smile, several of them relate to how Julie and Xue Li make me smile:

1. Smile Often.

2. Hold a door open for someone,

3. Pay for the person in line behind you.

4. Send a hand-written thank you card to someone who assisted you with something.

5. Clean out all your old clothes and donate them to someone in need.

6. Give a compliment about a waiter, waitress, sales clerk, etc. to his or her manager.

7. Compliment a stranger’s appearance.  Flatter them.

8. Leave encouraging post-it notes in library books and other random places.

9. Help an elderly person carry something.

10. Send flowers to someone anonymously.

11. Be a courteous driver.  Let people merge in front of you.

12. Volunteer at a children’s hospital or nursing home.

13. Donate blood.

14. Buy house warming gifts for new neighbours.

15. Introduce yourself.  Make new colleagues, classmates, etc. feel welcome.

16. Inspire others online.

17. Send letters of appreciation to business owners/managers and other people who support you.

18. Treat everyone with the same level of respect you’d give to your grandfather.

19. Give everyone the same level of patience you’d have with your baby sister.

20. Appreciate people the way they are.

21. Share your lunch or a snack with someone who doesn’t have one.

22. Put some change in an expired parking meter.

23. Check up on someone who looks lonely.

24. Tell your boss, teacher or professor that he or she is doing a great job and that you appreciate what they’ve taught you.

25. Create places and things for others to enjoy.  Like decorating your house for the holidays or creating a piece of art.

26. If you overhear that it’s someone’s birthday, go out of your way to wish them a happy one.

27. Ask someone for their opinion or advice.

28. Bring cookies or bagels to work for everyone.

29. Tip waiters and waitresses well when they deserve it.

30. Be a part of something you believe in.  Those around you will notice your enthusiasm.

31. Leave a thank-you note for the office janitors.

32. Help bag your own groceries at the checkout counter.

33. Offer your seat to someone when there aren’t any left.

34. Let someone with only a few items cut you in line at the grocery store.

35. Wave to a kid in the car next to you.

36. Spread the good news.

37. Repeat something nice you heard about someone else.

38. Remember people’s names and address them accordingly.

39. When you make eye contact with someone, smile.

40. Replace what you’ve used.  For example, fill up the copier or printer with paper after you’re done using it.

41. Share your umbrella on a rainy day.

42. Listen intently to people’s stories without trying to fix everything.

43. Dance with someone who hasn’t been asked.

44. Call a stranger’s attention to a beautiful sunset or full moon.

45. Give words of encouragement toward someone’s dream, no matter how big or small it is.

46. Ask someone who enjoys cooking for a recipe.

47. Let someone else eat the last slice of pizza or cake.

48. Stop and buy a drink from a kid’s lemonade stand.

49. Help someone get your parking space in a crowded parking lot when you’re leaving.

50. Ask someone you see every now and then if they’ve lost weight.

51. Do a little something extra to make someone else’s life easier.

52. Use all the manners you learned in Kindergarten.

53. Listen to someone’s pain and help them find a path through it.

54. Give without expecting to get back.

55. Encourage others to do one unanticipated kind or helpful act at least once a week.

56. Observe everyone without judging.

57. Say “Please” and “Thank you.”

58. Forgive and let go of anger.  For instance, if somebody accidentally cuts you off in traffic, just let it go.

59. Believe in yourself with all of your heart.  People will notice.

60. Don’t be so serious all the time.

61. Treat every small interaction with another person as an opportunity to make a positive impact in both your lives.

62. Greed, anger and ignorance.  Avoid all three.

63. Speak your truth.

64. Teach others how to make a difference by setting an example.

65. Help others be independent.

66. Give people the space they need.

67. Lend your shoulder to cry on.

68. Offer encouragement after a failure.

69. Acknowledge people for a job well done.

70. Tell a good joke.

71. Clean up after yourself.

72. Excel at what you do.  People appreciate professionals.

73. Create a care package and send it to an active duty military unit.

74. Redirect gifts.  Instead of having people give you birthday and holiday gifts, ask them to donate gifts or money to a good cause.

75. Stop to help.  The next time you see someone pulled over with a flat tire, or in need of assistance, stop and ask how you can help

76.Put a small personal touch on everything you do.  People notice and appreciate individuality.

77. Take the time to teach someone a skill you know.

78. Help someone get active.  There’s a coworker or acquaintance in your life who wants to get healthy but needs a helping hand.  Offer to go walking or running together, to join a gym together.

79. Send a nice email to a tech support representative who has assisted you.

80. Donate food to a charity.

81. Stand up for someone.  Lend your voice. Often the powerless, the homeless, the neglected in our world need someone to speak up for them.

82. If you see a couple taking a self-pic, offer to take the picture for them.

83. Help the weary shopper in front of you who needs those extra two or three cents to avoid breaking a 20-dollar bill.

84. Come to the rescue.  If you realize someone is sick, bring them some hot tea, etc.

85. Stand up for your beliefs without flaunting them.

86. Make yourself available and approachable.

87. Over-deliver on all of your promises and obligations.

88. Be positive and focus on what’s right.

88 Luft ballons of how to make people smile later we move on, what does the world say about the value of friendships, here are a few of my favourites:

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1. The power of we, it can make you well.

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2. They are your personal Santa’s little helper: That’s What Friends Are For.

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3. I so love that silence, it is special.

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4. We are all along for the ride, where the hell are we going: No Idea.

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5. Thank them for letting you practice being in the world.

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6. Become the disturbance in their life that has them known they are loved: Greatest Love of All.

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7. Heartspace, Soul Love.

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8. One of the main benefits of having healthy friendships: Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.

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9. Because I loved the image.

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10. The Bard chimes in with this classic: Grown Woman.

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11. Cripps or Bloods, Choose.

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12. Kids movies have certainly offered up some of the worlds greatest quotes: Always look on the Bright Side of Life.

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13. We don’t have to always feel our best to make life long friends.

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14, Miraculous, really: Promised You a Miracle.

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15. Angelo Lagusa is the main protagonist of the game 91 Days. He is an orphan who lost his parents and brother to the Vanetti Family, having witnessed them being gunned down on his birthday.

So a final word on how to generate meaningful friendships: Above all, live proudly.  Inspire people with who you are and how you live your life.

The playlist begins today with a famous crew: Whitney, Luther, Dionne and Stevie. Don Tolver is new to me. Whitney Houston again. then some great pop from Wham. My pop diva fetish is fulfilled with Beyonce. Eric Idle is silly next and we finish with some live Simple Minds: No, I Don’t Think I’ll Kiss You!!!

Friendships, some last less than a month, others are from your childhood. However long, I firmly believe they are what will make my ethos for the planet, Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included become reality. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Who Hurt You, My Own Expectations!!!


Do you remember or have you ever read the saying by Maria Robinson:” Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending”. I recently had an interaction with one of my English students that brought this to the fore, she was in deep pain about her son, and I could do something about it but was it my right to take her pain away in a teacher/student relationship. This sums up what I did, this is what I wrote as my  #Winsday, which is a celebration we make in a course I am doing called Rise – Speaker training, it is one of the best things I have done for years and I do a lot of personal development. 

I’m not sure how to start this “Win” My English student said I have something to show you I don’t understand. It was an email from her son’s teacher recommending that they have a Mental health assessment done on him sooner than later as she was incredibly worried for his ongoing wellbeing. Mental health is not a biggie amongst Upper-middle-class Chinese families, especially when it is their one beloved child. After some discussion, I worked out her husband is in total denial of it and keeps saying he is fine. Coincidentally one of my best friends is head of the Child Psychology unit at the Austin Hospital, I contacted her as to what they needed to do about it. My student kept drifting between calling her son abnormal to breaking down and crying. I stood in the power of the central position and helped her keep in touch with her love for him and taking some action. In the end, we had booked a call with her GP the following day. I think without this work I would have given in to its none of my business very early on surviving in the backward position of communication.

I realise I did it because there were times in my life I had seen my own pain and my friend’s pain and done nothing about it. So what does the world say about hurt and pain and how we relate to it:

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1. Yep, I was guilty as charged for years and years using this supposed protection method as my friends would not want to know the truth, luckily I have learnt this was a bald-faced lie and they loved me for all of me, warts and all.

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2. For each of us, the level of hurt that is defined as bad is unique: Hurt – NIN.

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3. V.J., whoever she is, points out what often happens in our relationship with others we meet on the journey of life.

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4. Stop doing this in the name of Love: Stop In The Name Of Love.

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5. I had many bruises from my 40 year battle with alcohol, the best thing I did when I went cold turkey 5 years ago to heal my chi energy.

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6. Not the easiest thing to do, but it is what got me out of a 5-year mental health crisis that saw me be hospitalised 6 times: Believe.

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7. What a great question to ask yourself to begin the healing process.

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8. Do you accept the option: Bring Me To Life.

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9. All pain is not bad for you.

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10. Not too sure about this, to me both modalities are valid: Letting Go.

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11. A guaranteed recipe to have hurt and pain in your life, hate others.

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12. My friends’ daughter went to this extreme as well, it was only the love of her parents that got her through it: Till I Collapse.

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13. Lewis and fellow novelist J. R. R. Tolkien were close friends. They both served on the English faculty at Oxford University and were active in the informal Oxford literary group known as the Inklings.

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14. If you are born as a human, you will suffer it, enjoy the journey and what it is meant to teach you, avoiding it is not the way to go: Hurt – JC.

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15. Bianca Sparacino has an interesting life motto: If you don’t fit in, you’re doing something right. It seems a great description of Living a life without any pain, don’t do that.

So how do we lessen the pain, here is my friend Marc Chernoff’s 30 suggestions to stop doing to Yourself:

  1. Stop spending time with the wrong people.
  2. Stop running from your problems
  3. Stop lying to yourself.
  4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner.
  5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not.
  6. Stop trying to hold onto the past.
  7. Stop being scared to make a mistake.
  8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes.
  9. Stop trying to buy happiness.
  10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness.
  11. Stop being idle.
  12. Stop thinking you’re not ready.
  13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.
  14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work.
  15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else.
  16. Stop being jealous of others.
  17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself.
  18. Stop holding grudges.
  19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level.
  20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others.
  21. Stop doing the same things over and over without a break.
  22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.
  23. Stop trying to make things perfect.
  24. Stop following the path . of least resistance.
  25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t.
  26. Stop blaming others for your troubles.
  27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone.
  28. Stop worrying so much.
  29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen.
  30. Stop being ungrateful.

Have a go at a few of these and see how your hurt and pain levels shift.

Today’s playlist has another first, two versions of the same song. We begin with Nine Inch Nails, then some Motown from The Supremes. Then three bands – Mumford and Sons, Evanescence and Paul McCartney and Wings. Two of my favourites complete the set, the penultimate tune is from Eminem and we complete with Johnny Cash: Who Hurt You, My Own Expectations.

 

So if the world can turn down it’s hurt and pain levels, I reckon my Interculturalist ethos for the world of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included has a better chance. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Told You So. Sincerely, Your Intuition!!!


Apres workshop continuation, I have been having these amazing conversations with people by asking them do they know what their passion for life is. I have been sharing about one of mine, My Sacred Love Stories workshop idea.

The concept came as follows: One night I was making chai at Mojo – The Dance of Connection and I looked through the window onto the dance floor and the thought that a majority of these beautiful people would go home alone, and this made my heart very sad. Shortly after the words, Sacred Love Stories passed through. I pondered this for the following week and came up with the following. The premise is that we have stopped being vulnerable with each other, the evidence being the divorce rate, that the average length of a relationship for 18 to 35 years olds is six months and the existence of Tinder. So in the workshop, you will work through the chakras, telling your partner your if you knew this about me, I would die and your, No, I am not boasting, I actually did this stories for the distinction of each chakra. You practice with a fellow participant so that you can increase your ability to be vulnerable and then go home and do it with your beloveds.

So that’s one of my passions, Time for my friend Marc’s list on the subject:

1. When passion and skill work together, the end result is a masterpiece.

2. Your work is to discover your work and then, with all your heart, to give yourself to it.

3. If you are passionate about it, pursue it, no matter what anyone thinks. That’s how dreams are achieved.

4. The heart of human excellence often begins to beat when you discover a pursuit that absorbs you, frees you, challenges you, and gives you a sense of meaning, joy and passion.

5. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write. The concept can be applied universally/

6. It’s not how much money you make that ultimately makes you happy. It’s whether or not your work fulfils you.

7. No matter how many times you break down, there should always be a little voice inside you that says, “NO, you’re not done yet! Get back up!” That’s the voice of passion and courage.

8. Only passions, great passions, can elevate the soul to great things.

9. Find what makes you come alive, whatever it is. Become it and let it become you, and great things happen FOR you. TO you and BECAUSE of you.

10. Purpose is the reason you journey. Passion is the fire that lights your way,

11. If you cannot put your heart into it, take yourself out of it.

12. Continue to work hard at what you love no matter what the odds are. Eventually, someone will praise and appreciate what you do.

13. It’s not about getting a chance. It’s about taking a chance. You’ll rarely be 100% sure it will work, but you can be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work. Sometimes you just have to go for it.

People have been passionate throughout recorded history, what have they said about it, here we go:

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1. Remember, you are a sovereign being.

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2. In our country, the official retirement age used to be 65, many people died soon after. The passion was missing: The Power and The Passion.

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3. Of course, Oprah would be one of the quoters.

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4. Supposedly, the percentage of people who do this is at an all-time low: Money.

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5. Besides being an amazing sci-fi writer, Kurt Vonnegut said some good shit about passion and purpose.

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6. To help with this, I would recommend reading Lissa Rankins great book on the subject, The Fear Cure: Lose Yourself.

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7. Time to open up one of the largest organs in your body.

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8. Just don’t, okay: Not Afraid.

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9. Born in Manchester, Jamaica in 1967, Bailey immigrated to Canada at age 13 and played basketball with John Degenhardt before his graduation at Queen Elizabeth Park High School in Oakville, Ontario. He began competing as a 100 m sprinter part-time in 1991, but he did not take up the sport seriously until 1994. At that time, he was also a stockbroker. He won the gold medal at the 1996 Olympic games.

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10. The cardigan-wearing one, Eckhart Tolle time. Yes, The Power of Now: Sing for the Moment.

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11. Some deeper stuff from Carl.

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12. Already naked, follow your heart – Great words: Follow Your Heart.

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13. There are no promises you will wake up tomorrow, we just live our lives like it is a given.

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14. What is the anatomy of your Calling: Wake Me Up.

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15. And for our final lesson, there is really no other choice.

So we will finish with another list titled Passion questions to make you think:

1. What will you never give up on

2. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

3. What activities make you lose track of time?

4. What fascinates you?

5. What’s something you would do every day if you could?

6. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

7. What would you do DIFFERENTLY if you knew nobody would judge you?

8. Would you rather have less work or more work you actually enjoy doing?

9. What is something you would hate to go without for a day?

10. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?

Today’s playlist contains three songs from the same artist, never been done before. We begin with one of Australia’s great rock and roll band, Midnight Oil, then off to the UK for Pink Floyd. across to the USA for three Eminem tracks, then Germany for the Scorpions and we complete with Avicii: Told You So. Sincerely, Your Intuition!!!

Lets complete with why we follow our passions: No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying, Love and Respect to All,, Everyone Included. Until we meet again, my dear friends. Remember you can sign up to receive the blog in your inbox on the right-hand side.

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Answer with a Kiss!!!


Still integrating the workshop. This week I have been noticing the things I have stopped doing to myself and others. Such as actually being present in conversations, noticing things that are not impeccable and just walking past them but actually doing something about it. It feels like a really different universe I am walking in. Went to my friend Marc’s book for some inspiration – here is a list of 30 Things to stop doing to yourself that will improve your life in general:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people.

2. Stop running from your problems.

3. Stop lying to yourself.

4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner.

5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not.

6. Stop trying to hold onto the past.

7. Stop being scared to make a mistake.

8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes.

9. Stop trying to buy happiness.

10. Stop looking to others for happiness.

11. Stop waiting.

12. Stop thinking you’re not ready.

13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.

14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work.

15. Stop trying to compete against everybody else.

16. Stop being jealous of others.

17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself.

18. Stop holding grudges.

19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level.

20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others.

21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break.

22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.

23. Stop trying to make things perfect.

24. Stop following the path of least resistance.

25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t.

26. Stop blaming others for your troubles.

27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone.

28. Stop worrying so much.

29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen.

30. Stop being ungrateful.

So I reckon you could choose one or two of these to take on fortnightly and see your life transform in front of your eyes, and your perception of the lives of your significant others.

Time to walk down the what does the world say about this lane:

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1. Time to undo those restrictive relationship knots and gain some freedom.

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2. Crossing oceans can be adventurous or amazingly tiring if you are doing it with people who don’t really want to be there: Six Months In A Leaky Boat.

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3. But we are not talking about giving up everything for others.

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4. Welcome to the house of …: House of Fun.

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5. Self Love 101.

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6. From one of my top ten, I have 5,000 people and groups I follow so rate Danielle’s wisdom highly: Stop in the Name of Love.

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7. The cardigan-wearing one, Eckhart Tolle’s philosophy is present here: The Power of Now.

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8. You know which things you do to discard, it is not these ones: From Little Things, Big Things Grow.

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9. Or these, as well or you will find yourself at that well-known square on the monopoly board.

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10. Two words – Right On: All Rise.

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11. Classic Tom Waits, that’s why I love his music so much.

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12. Now, these things, let go of: Set Your Controls for the Heart of The Sun.

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13. I thought it would say, Brene Brown, not Eddie Rickenbacker.

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14. Lifts all the weight off your heart and soul, doing this: Brave.

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15. And our final lesson in what is possible in taking on a practice of a few of these stops a month: you start caring about what really matters to you.

Many of the things we think will make us happier, more successful, more famous are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter, and working on our passions.

OMG, there’s a boy band in the playlist, with 55 million hits. Split Enz starts the journey, a New Zealand product, then off to the UK with Madness. Trump nation next with the Supremes. Australia’s offering is next with Paul Kelly and Missy Higgins, my most chosen song, why, because it’s so epic, that’s why. The Boy band Blue precede the penultimate track by Pink Floyd, and we finish in the present with Sara Bareilles: Answer with a Kiss.

So, imagine if each person on the planet stopped doing what did not work for them. My ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included would have a much better chance and earlier fruition. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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The Heart wants What It Wants!!!


Another thing I have got out of Awakening Connections is the ability to feel the love being directed at me. I was at Mojo – The Dance of Connection on Saturday night for my crewing role as chai maker extraordinaire, and it felt different. There were people, particularly women who have been coming for ages who kept hugging me and kissing me at the end of a dance, some I even kissed back. I have taken on a practice to allow this love in, reciting some mantras from my friends Marc and Angel Chernoff through a practice we call Dragonspeak in the Warriors of Love, my go-to 12-month training program to empower the lifeforce that runs through each of us: Some WOL info.

The mantras are as follows, they help me love people, not judge them or ignore them:

1. The most beautiful thing is to see a person nearby smiling. And even more beautiful is knowing you are the reason behind it.

2. If I have the power to make someone happier today, do it. The world needs more of that.

3. Some people build lots of walls in their lives and . not enough bridges. There’s no good reason to be one of them. Open me up. Take small chances on people.

4. Never stop doing little things for those around me. Sometimes these little things occupy the biggest parts of their hearts.

5. Too often I underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of love – all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

6. Be present, Be thoughtful. Compliment people. Magnify their strengths, not their weaknesses. This is how to make a real and lasting difference in my relationships, new and old.

7. I don’t always need to give advice. Sometimes all people need is a hand to hold, an ear to listen, and a heart to understand.

8. Today, just be 100 per cent present with those around me – be all there. That is enough.

9. There’s no such thing as “self-made”. Someone else believed in me. Someone also encouraged me. Someone else invested in me. Someone else prayed for you. Someone else spoke life over me. I will be that someone for others too.

10. It’s practically impossible to love my neighbours if I don’t know them, and yet that’s oftentimes the case. I live in such a hyper-connected world with such limited or nonexistent connection. Remember this: Relationships matter. Stories matter.

11. In human relationships, distance is not measured in kilometres but in affection. Two people can be right next to each other yet miles apart.

12. Stay in touch with those who truly matter to me – not because it’s inconvenient, but because they’re worth the extra effort.

13. The single greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. Too often we don’t listen to understand, we listen to reply. Bring awareness to this. And listen for what’s truly behind the words.

14. Set an example. Treat everyone with respect, even those who are rude to you – not because they are always nice, but because I am ( And do my best to be thankful for the rude and difficult people too, they serve as great reminders of how not to be.)

15. Sometimes it is better to be kind than right.

16. People are much nicer when they are happier, which says a lot about those who aren’t very nice to you. Sad, but true.

17. The real test comes when I don’t get what I expect from people. Will I react in anger? Or will calmness be my superpower?

18. The way I trust people  I don’t understand is a report card on what I’ve learnt about love, compassion, and kindness.

19. Be kinder than necessary. What goes around comes around. No one has ever made themselves strong by showing how small someone else is.

20. The best relationships are not just about the good times I share, They are about the obstacles we got through together and the fact that I still say “I Love You” in the end.

So how does the world talk about love, here are a few of my favourite things:

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1. A required part of the recipe of life.

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2. Not always loved by her critics, great people always seem to have them, the people of the slums idolised her: Is This Love.

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3. Simply, Boom!!!

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4. From the world’s best-known philosopher, Ms Unknown comes some worldly advice about the importance of self-love: Lose Yourself.

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5. These are the people who showed up when your soul said to you, find the others.

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6. One of the founders of the Black Panther movement who after exile returned to the States to become a conservative Republican and Christian, Eldridge travelled an extreme journey to discover love in his life: Blowing In The Wind.

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7. Don’t look in your logical mind for love, it’s your like zone.

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8. The area of life that blows away Simon Senik’s statement you have to know your why: To Love Somebody.

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9. It’s in both your DNA’s.

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10. And she: Born To Be Yours.

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11. Sage advice from the writer of many a great love song over her long career.

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12. Working on both these areas in my life: The Climb.

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13. Remember to keep an eye out for this.

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14. Yep to this: A Song For You.

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15. For our final lesson, a short sermon on how to let love in.

So lets address loving those offensive people we find so hard to love. Marc has a trick: Mentally hug them and wish them better days. We can have compassion for this broken person because we all have been broken and in some pain at some point too. We’re the same in many ways. Sometimes we need a hug, some extra compassion, and a little unexpected love.

Our playlist today begins with Bob Marley, the king of Love in my humble opinion. The rapping out with Eminem. Some folk from Peter, Paul and Mary follows. From the same era comes The Bee Gees. We come forward to Kygo and the imagine Dragons and Miley Cyrus and complete with the soulful tones of Donny Hathaway: The Heart Wants What It Wants,

Letting love in and expressing it outwardly will certainly support my life’s ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. Remember you can sign up to receive these blogs in your inbox on the right-hand side of my main page. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Stop Clicking Your Pens!!!


Isn’t it true that in high school when the teacher told you to stop clicking your pen you did it at least once more? What are the truths you remember in your life, are they experiential moments or are they rules your parents raised you by. Here is a list that my friend Marc picked up while travelling, living in different cities, working for different companies ( and himself ), and meeting remarkable and unusual people everywhere in between:

  1. There comes a point in life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything, but it’s not giving up. It’s realising you don’t need certain people and things and the drama they bring.
  2. You can’t control how other people feel, or how they recieve your energy. Anything you do or say gets filtered through a mindset occupied by whatever they are going through at the moment, which has nothing to do with you. Just keep doing your thing with as much love as possible.
  3. If a person wants to be part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so. Don’t bother reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.
  4. If you want to fly, you have to give up the things that weigh you down- which is not always so obvious.
  5. Doing something and getting it wrong is at least 10 times more productive than doing nothing.
  6. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You don’t fail by falling down. You fail by never getting back up. Sometimes you just have to forget how you feel, remember what you deserve, and keep pushing forward.
  7. The more things you own, the more things own you. Less truly gives you more freedom.
  8. While you’re busy looking for the perfect person, you’ll probably miss the imperfect person who could make you perfectly happy. This is as true for friendships as it is for intimate relationships. Finding a partner or a friend isn’t about trying to transform yourself into the perfect image of what you think they want. It’s about being exactly who you are and then finding someone who appreciates that.
  9. Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. If something is meant to be, it will happen – at the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason.
  10. Making a hundred friends is not a miracle. A miracle is making one friend who will stand by your side when hundreds have walked away.
  11. Someone will always be better looking. Someone will always be smarter. Someone will always be more charismatic. But they never will be you – with your exact ideas, knowledge and skills.
  12. Making progress involves risk. Period. You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
  13. Every morning you are faced with two choices: you can aimlessly stumble through the day not knowing what’s going to happen and simply react to events at aa moment’s notice, or you can go through life directing your own life and making your own destiny and decisions.
  14. Everyone makes mistakes. If you can’t forgive others, don’t expect them to forgive you. Set yourself free by forgiving someone else.
  15. It’s Ok to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. Cry if you need to – It’s healthy to shed tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
  16. We sometimes do things that are permanently foolish just because we are temporarily upset. A lot of heartaches can be avoided if you learnt to control your emotions.
  17. Someone doesn’t have to be wrong for you to be right. You have to allow people to make their own mistakes and their own decisions.
  18. Nobody has it easy, Everyone of us has issues. So don’t belittle yourself or anyone else. Everyone is fighting their own unique war.
  19. A smile doesn’t always mean a person is happy. Sometimes it simply means they are strong enough to face their problems.
  20. The happiest people I know keep an open mind to new ideas and ventures, use their leisure time as a means of mental development, and love good music, good books, good pictures, good company and good conversation. And oftentimes they are the cause of happiness in others – me in particular.
  21. You can’t take things too personally. Rarely do people do things because of you. They do things because of them.
  22. Feelings change, people change, and time keeps rolling on. You can hold onto past mistakes or you can create your own happiness. Don’t make the mistake of waiting on someone or something to come along and make you happy.
  23. It’s much harder to change the length of your life than the depth of it.
  24. You end up regretting the things you did not do far more than the things you did.
  25. When you stop chasing the wrong things, you give the right things a chance to catch you.
  26. One of the greatest challenges in life is to be yourself in a world that’s trying to make you the same as everyone else.
  27. Enjoy the little things, because they’re bigger than they first appear.
  28. Anyone can make a difference. You have more power than you think. Use it.
  29. Every experience is a life lesson – everyone you meet, everything you encounter. Never forget to acknowledge the lesson, especially when things don’t go your wat. Gain insight and move forward.
  30. Regardless of how dark your past has been, your future is still spotless. Don’t start your day with the broken pieces of yesterday. Each day is a new beginning. Every morning you wake up is the first day of the rest of your life. What do you want to make happen?

So what has humanity said about its truth’s, here are a few of my favourites:

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1. Living your truth may not always be comfortable, but well worth it.

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2. But you can also reclaim some of your own truth by looking at what made you angry in the first place: Dark Horse.

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3. What truths do you keep in your personal treasure chest?

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4. From Sydney, Australia Palak Gupta won the Miss India crown. At just the age of 20 Palak’s truth is that life isn’t about your height, weight and shade. It’s about the values and beliefs you embrace, your truths: Unwritten.

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5. What to carry in your makeup kit for life.

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6. From Russia with Love: Time and Glass.

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7. It’s up to Us.

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8. Everyone is Free now: Everything is Free Now. 

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9. From the man who gave us bliss, his truth about life.

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10. What mask do you present to life that hides your truths from your dearest and nearest: Behind The Mask.

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11. And then we find someone to share our truths with.

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12. My ethos in life is Love and Respect for All. Everybody Included: Respect Yourself.

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13. Do you worship your truths, what value do you give them?

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14. As Marc says in poit 7, it is not the things you own that measure your lifestyle, but how you are remembered: Happy.

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15. And for our final lesson, it’s good to remember the shadow and the light in our lives.

So to make it really the longest blog I have ever done, 10 more truth questions:

  1. What does the child inside you long for?
  2. What is the one thing right now that you are totally sure of?
  3. What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?
  4. What is the biggest motivator in your life right now?
  5. What are you most grateful for?
  6. What have you counting or keeping track of recently?
  7. What’s the difference between being alive and truly living?
  8. If you had the opportunity to get a message across to a large group of people what would your message be?
  9. Have you done anything lately worth remembering?
  10. When is the last time you tried something new?

Today’s playlist begins in pop diva land with Katie Perry and Natasha Bedingfield. We then journey to Russia with Name 505. Gillian Welch then sets us free, Michael Jackson lifts our masks. Madonna is the penultimate track and we finish with Pharrell Williams: Stop Clicking Your Pens.

My truth for the world is Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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