I went to a local council meeting today to support a group who had been defunded, there was a lot of anger in the room. One group called the other racist for doing it, and there were allegations flying everywhere. I left as it did not seem to be serving many purposes, the decision to not defund them was watered down to a prissy offering of looking at other means of funding them. So it appears they must use the energy of their anger to fight the next battle.
So anger, what is its purpose and is it very useful in today’s world? Marc Chernoff writes about it as follows:
WHEN SOMEONE UPSETS us, It’s often because they aren’t behaving according to our fantasy of how they “should” behave. The frustration, then, stems not from their behaviour differs from our expectations. This is a moment for looking within.
You can’t control how other people behave. You can’t control everything that happens to you. What you can control is how you respond to it all. Your power lies in your response. Let’s practice together…
- Get comfortable with pausing.
- Respect people’s differences.
- Be compassionate
- Extend generosity and grace.
- Don’t take people’s behaviour personally.
- Talk less and learn to appreciate silence.
- Create a morning ritual that starts your day off right.
- Cope using healthy choices and alternatives
- Remind yourself of what’s right, and create more of it in the world.
What has the world written about the power that Anger has over us, here are a few of my favourites:
1. I wouldn’t suggest telling someone they are being stupid if they make you angry, that would mean there would then be two angry people in the room.
2. Known for his satirical wit and sardonic view of human nature, Ambrose Bierce earned the nickname “Bitter Bierce.” His mocking cynicism is on full display in The Devil’s Dictionary, a work that originally appeared under the title The Cynic’s Word Book. … As a short story writer, Bierce gave us many treasures: No Regrets.
3. Ralph points out simple homegrown logic in a lot of his quotes, check out this classic.
4. They say it is better to reclaim the anger than have it reclaim us by being blurted out all of a sudden: Just Give Me a Reason.
5. In the development work I do, we speak of the immature feminine and masculine, and the mature feminine and masculine. Guess in which fields an insecure personality would hang around in?
6. Anger doesn’t tend to hang around in the field of contentment: Going Through Changes.
7. The cardigan-wearing one points out what lies within when we are angry.
8. From the 16th Century, noted English poet Alexander Pope talks about anger being revenge on oneself: Smells Like Teen Spirit.
10. Not a good anxiety practice, going to bed angry: Fight for the Right.
12. From the man who found enlightenment under the Bodhi tree, why holding onto anger is so toxic: Burning Down The House.
13. Commonly known as a foot in mouth disease.
14. It’s the old one finger pointing forward, three backwards routine: Lithium.
15. The final lesson is that anger is just as important to deal with as all the other things we feel.
Everybody gets upset and loses their temper sometimes. Remind yourself that we are all more alike than we are different. When you catch yourself being angry with someone, add “just like me sometimes” Choose to let things go. Let others off the hook. Take the high road today.
Today’s playlist is anthem clad. From the 60s we begin with The Walker Brothers followed by some angst from Pink. My favourite white rapper Eminem is next, then the first of two Nirvana entries. A unique version of The Beastie Boys biggest hit will test your mettle. Talking Heads second last then back to Nirvana to finish off this great rocking playlist: You are not alone in This.
So the world does not say anger is bad all the time, I believe I need some to get my ethos, Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included to triumph over the current world conversation. Remember if you like these blogs of mine sign up to have them in your inbox on the day of creation. Until next time we meet, my dear friends.