Someone asked me recently, “What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you.” It’s like they are asking do other peoples opinions decide what you do in life. Truth be told, nobody has the right to judge you. People may have heard your stories, but they can’t feel what you are going through, they aren’t living YOUR life. So forget what they say about you. Focus on how you feel about yourself, and do what you know in your heart is right.
My friend Marc Chernoff’s list gifts us ten things to do for ourselves even if others judge you for it:
1. Take care of yourself.
2. Do what you know is right, for YOU.
3. Follow your own unique path.
4. Lock yourself away from the world and work on your goals.
5. Adjust your goals and dreams as life changes.
6. Forgive those who have wronged you.
7. Show everyone your love and kindness.
8. Stand up for others, even if it’s the unpopular thing to do.
9. Fight through your failures.
10. Keep your head held high and keep on smiling.
As Jack London once said, “The proper function of man is to live, not to exist”. so why do we take notice of how people judge us, and what has society said about judgement over time:
1. How would the planet operate if we all did this?
2. Remember when you are pointing a finger there are three pointing back at you: Only God Can Judge Me.
3. Judgements are normally instant before you know anything about a person or situation. Show some kindness and ask what is happening for them.
4. Everybody’s life changes each chapter. Learn the full story before you make your decision.: It’s my Life.
5. Anne Inez McCaffrey was an American-born writer who emigrated to Ireland and was best known for the Dragonriders of Pern science fiction series. Early in McCaffrey’s 46-year career as a writer, she became the first woman to win a Hugo Award for fiction and the first to win a Nebula Award.
6. To each, their own: Judge Not.
7. As you are about to do it, remember how it felt last time it happened to you.
8. Each of us has our own deadly sins, mine are chocolate and icecream: Sinnerman.
9. Brene has something to say about it.
10. Very difficult to do I have found: Hallelujah.
11. There are 7 billion unique individuality types on the planet, remember that.
12. His Holiness rocks: One Love.
13. Mother Teresa was known for getting in people’s faces, she does not hold back here.
14. Two Bob Marley songs and this fantastic anti-judgement quote: Creep.
15. And for the final lesson, what would it take you to get to live your life from this premise?
Every new day is a chance to change your life. Work on making life all that you want it to be. Work hard for what you believe, and keep your dreams big and your worries small. You never need to carry more than you can hold; just take it one day at a time. And while you’re out there making decisions instead of excuses, learning new things, and getting closer and closer to your dreams, know that there are others out there, like me, who admire your efforts and are striving for greatness too.
There are some giants of the music scene on today’s playlist. Two songs by the same artist but both not done by him, one is a cover. Tupac leads off, Then to the world of rock and roll with Bon Jovi. Bob Marley’s first-ever single follows. Then, two giants, Nina Simone and Leonard Cohen, both recorded live. The penultimate number is a cover of Bob by Playing for Change and we complete with Radiohead: Be Curious, Not Judgemental.
I have found as I become less judgemental I come closer and closer to living my life ethos – Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included. Until we meet again my dear friends.