Who Really, Really knows you?


I was asked this question by a friend today when I looked I said my sisters Ruth and Jann. Amy then asked me what about your friends, I have 5000 Facebook friends and I would say one of them, my long time friend Clare who helped me through my recent mental health breakdown would be the closest. What is it that stops the human race letting people get close to them? I have an idea, I believe we stop telling each other what I call our Sacred Love Stories at an early age for fear of being hurt. These are the negative and positive stories about ourselves that go like this: If you knew this about me I would have to kill you and I am not boasting, I really went through or did this. I designed a workshop around the chakras using that technology but my if you knew this about me I would have to kill you got in the way of me ever running it.

What does it take to totally trust someone to be authentic and not withhold anything? I am learning how to do this and acknowledge Amy, who is allowing me to go on this journey with her. So what has society said about knowing the real you, lets have a look:

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1. Dale Evans Rogers (born Lucille Wood Smith; October 31, 1912 – February 7, 2001) was an American actress, singer, and songwriter. She was the third wife of singing cowboy Roy Rogers.

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2. I have been being taught this powerfully over the last week: You Really Got Me.

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3. Very relatable.

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4. And that the stories you make up in your head about the people in your life are not true until you get to deeply know them: Say It Right.

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5. Boom!!!

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6. Prayer is such a powerful healing tool: Praying.

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7. Warts and All comes to mind.

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8. And in front of the L-word do not forget to put the Self word: Rainbow.

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9. I think she is.

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10.. The whole kit and caboodle, that’s true love: Who You Are.

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11. I have found out lately I do this most of my waking moments.

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12. Another form of insomnia: You are the Reason.

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13. My new life contract.

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14. From one of civilisation’s great thinkers, This: Love Myself.

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15. And for our final lesson, we cross to Socrates best buddy, Plato.

No list as promised, Amy, just a deep sense of gratitude for your listening for me.

The playlist begins with a 60’s classic from The Kinks. Then we delve into pop diva land for the next four tracks: Nelly Furtado, Kesha twice and Jessie J. Over to C & W for the next track from Callum Scott and we complete with my most played song by Hailee Steinfeld: Who Really Really Knows You.

Another recent question has come to mind writing this, what would you say if you could say one thing to the world leaders, of course, Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included.

Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Are you Enough?


How often have you asked yourself this question? They say that you make your prime decision about your life by the age of seven years old, then spend the rest of your life surviving it via therapy or being in the winner’s circle.

Over to my friend Marc Chernoff to provide a list that will support us in this area. It is called 12 choices your future self will thank you for:

When life pushes you over, stand up and push back even harder, when there is a fork in the road and choices to make, make the ones your future self will thank you for:

1. Choosing you – The most exhausting activity is pretending to be who you know you aren’t.

2. Appreciating what you have – Sometimes, when you make the most out of what you have, it turns out to be a lot more than you ever imagined.

3. Believing in yourself and your dreams – Believe in you. Listen to your soul.

4, Being positive – You can’t live a positive life with a negative attitude.

5. Taking action – The happiest and most successful people are usually those who have broken the chains of procrastination.

6. Letting Go – The biggest step in changing the world around you is to change the world within you.

7. Picking yourself back up – Sometimes when things go wrong it’s because they would have turned out worse if they had gone right.

8. Ignoring negative people – You are not a rug; some people may try to walk all over you, but you don’t have to lie there and take it.

9. Staying in touch with close friends and family – There comes a time in life you’ll have to leave everything behind for a while and start something new, but never forget the people who stood by your side.

10. Making time for fun – Fun is way underrated.

11. Spreading Love and Kindness – The happiness surrounding you is greatly affected by the choices you make every day.

12. Being the change you want to see in the world – Don’t tell others how to live; live and let them watch you.

So what has the human race said about being enough, let’s have a look

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1. Three powerful statements on self love there.

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2. Love the last line: Never Stop.

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3. Time to break down the walls.

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4. And to stop pretending: Worth It.

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5. Read the handwriting.

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6. Having these in your heart definitely brings out the strength in you: You Say.

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7. What a great name: Badass Warrior Queen.

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8. I love memes with hearts in them: Fight Song.

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9. Some powerful I statements here.

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10. Some great words from our curly-haired genius: Somewhere over the Rainbow.

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11. What are your personal avatars?

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12. All hail Brene: Love Myself.

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13. That why all the good books say self-love first and foremost.

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14. These boots are made for walking: Boots.

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15. And the last offering comes from the cardigan-wearing one, Eckhart Tolle reminding us of the treasure we all have within:

So choose to spread love to one person a day, beginning with yourself would be a grand idea. Imagine the amount of happiness you can spread in a lifetime, day by day.

Today on the playlist we have an all-women lineup. We have something for the young and not so young. Two bands unknown to me start us off. The Brand New Heavies and Fifth Harmony, both have millions of followers. Lauren Daigle and Rachel Platten belt out a couple of anthems next. Then back in time to Judy Garland, the penultimate number is from Hailee Steinfeld and we finish with Nancy Sinatra: Are You Enough?

This actually is take two of this blog, I got one quote from the end and poof, it disappeared. But I had to mention my ethos, Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included and my ever-growing Facebook group calledInterculturalism. We would love you to join us to spread love and respect around the planet.

Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Writing your Life Story!!!


A friend just liked a meme I posted on Facebook. Its says the following: 4 Things you can’t get Back- The stone after it’s thrown; the word after it’s said; the occasion after its missed; the time after it’s gone. As I reach Age pension eligibility in four weeks they have made me ponder my life.

I like what my friend Marc Chernoff has to say about writing a life story worth living. I love this paragraph: When writing the story of your life, don’t let someone else hold the pen. Make conscious choices every day that align your actions with your values and your dreams; the way you live each day is a sentence in the story of your life. Each day, you choose whether the sentence ends with a period, a question mark, or an exclamation mark.

Here are Marc’s ten suggestions for doing this:

1. Find a passion that makes you come alive.

2. Work hard on that passion.

3. Live happily in your own way.

4. Change your path when you must, but keep moving forward.

5. When the going gets tough, keep fighting.

6. Let go of the past and live consciously in the present.

7. Embrace new ideas, lessons, and challenges.

8. Appreciate the little things in life that mean a lot.

9. Live honourably through kindness.

10. Spend quality time with people you love.

So what has society said about storytelling over time, we have always done it:

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1. Yes, that diatribe in your head, that’s the story of your life.

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2. Yes, it is official, I have a crush on Maya Angelou: Maya on Words.

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3. How do you tell the world about your ideas?

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4. How’s the living going?: Staying Alive.

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5. A great reason for my ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included.

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6. Our stories have had the world evolve: World Turning.

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7. What do you do in creating your communities storyline?

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8. Remember as children how much we loved this, it is still available: Magic Carpet Ride.

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9. Love this quote,  well done Christina.

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10. Wise words from one of the most amazing storytellers to have lived, think the Mac, the iPod, the iPhone: Steve’s Stanford Speech.

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11. Ground Control, to Major Tom.

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12. Where have you travelled in your reading?: 500 Miles.

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13. When I think of the big items I have brought in my life, this is oh so true in every case.

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14. And the bridge takes you over: Bridge over troubled Waters.

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15. And for our final lesson, we call on Ira Glass, host of This American Life and All Things Considered.

Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs, and what every great story has, are characters that come alive in the pursuit of something that inspires them.

The playlist contains words today. Firstly we have Maya Angelou, then The Bee Gees. Fleetwood Mac are next, followed by a 60’s classic by Steppenwolf. Lots of Words from Steve Jobs, his Stanford commencement speech. Then an anthem from the Proclaimers and we finish with the dulcet tones of John Legend: Writing you Life Story.

My life story, Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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It is hard to heal when you are lying to the world.


Hello,  dear friends and readers: this is my first blog since the first week of February, you are still reading them, even in bigger numbers, thanks for that. Where have I been, I have been hanging out in the mental health universe, from deep in it to the recovery stage. At different stages, I lied to many professionals, my family and friends in the hope that would work in me recovering quicker. Strangely this did not work, perhaps the only thing was that I was released too early from the Melbourne Clinic and had to survive on my own for many hours at home when I was not truly ready.

So its times for my friend Marc Chernoff’s list of empowerment, no surprise I opened his book to this particular list:

12 Things You Should Be Able to Say to Yourself:

  1. I am following my heart and. intuition.
  2. I am proud of myself.
  3. I am making a difference.
  4. I am happy and grateful.
  5. I am growing into the best version of myself.
  6. I am making my time count.
  7. I am honest with myself.
  8. I am good to those I care about.
  9.  I know what unconditional love feels like.
  10. I have forgiven those who once hurt me.
  11. I take full accountability for my life.
  12. I have no regrets.

There was a great deal of cringe factor in writing these as I am about 1 out of 10 for a lot of them.

So what should the quotes be about today, mental health or empowerment, I vote for mental health as not enough is written about that:

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1. Declaring you are in this process is a very important step, stop lying to yourself.

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2. One of my party tricks when I get struck down, cut everybody off, I would not recommend this as a powerful healing process: It’s My Party.

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3. How good is our society with it, they lock you up so you are out of the way, I don’t know whether I vote Yae or Nae to this.

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4. Some of this you forget in the depths of it: Love Myself

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5. You and your medication, I am a lifer, when I stop taking it, the dark times reappear.

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6. Remember to ask when its difficult RUOK: Feels.

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7. The amount of anxiety and handshaking I went through I do have to agree with this.

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8. Another way of saying the title of this blog: Change

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9. This would have made my list of 12 things.

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10. This would be a point of healing I could relate to: Both Sides Now.

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11. But there certainly are times you do not agree with this.

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12: Guilty as charged: Man Up.

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13. Great words from a previous POTUS.

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14. When you feel like you have a brick on your tongue, the third one is not that easy: I’m Walking on Sunshine.

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15. And our final quote is from someone the system missed.

I have not written my ethos in three months, so here I go: Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. My Psychiatrist thought this was far too a large step, I will take little steps, writing this blog is one of them. Until my net blog, my dear friends.

The playlist contains some great pop divas and a certified legend. We begin with Jessie J and Hailee Steinfeld. Calvin Harris is next, then Christine Aguilera. The legendary Joni Mitchell follows. Then a doco about men’s silence in this area. We finish on a bright note with Katrina and the Waves: It is hard to heal when you are lying to the world.

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Springtime for Hitler and Germany!!!


Why am I using a line from Zero Mostel’s iconic film the Producers as the title of my latest blog? I went to this inspirational event called Get Mic’d yesterday at which there was an opportunity for ten, which became 11 people because the presenter pulled out two names, not one for the final person to do a three-minute presentation and one of them tied the Fuhrer into their presentation on his love life. I cannot reveal any more due to privacy guidelines but it was epic.

What is speaking your truth? What do you have to give up to be able to do it? If you want to fly and move on to better things, you have yo give up the things that weigh you down – which is not always as obvious and easy as it sounds. My friend Marc Chernoff, author of 1,000+ little things Happy Successful People do differently makes this offering towards achieving the ability to do so:

1. Letting the opinions of others control your life – They know your name, not your story.

2. The shame of past failures – You will fail sometimes, and that’s okay.

3. Being indecisive about what you want – You will never leave where you are until you decide where you would rather be.

4. Procrastinating on the goals that matter to you – There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.

5. Choosing to do nothing – You don’t choose how you are going to die, or when.

6. Your need to be right – If you keep on saying you’re right, even if you are right now, eventually you will be wrong.

7. Running from problems that should be fixed – We make life harder than it has to be.

8. Making excuses rather than decisions – Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem-solving.

9. Overlooking the positive points in your life – What you see often depends on what you are looking for.

10. Not appreciating the present moment – We do not remember days, we remember moments.

So what has society made of speaking your truth over time, let’s have a look:

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1. We begin with one of the most recognised purveyors of the art alive on the planet today, Oprah Winfrey.

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2. You know its close to your truth when you can make the energy in the room shift: You’re the Voice.

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3. Self Love 101.

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4. When you speak the truth some won’t like it: They Don’t Like Me.

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5. Boom!!!

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6. Liar, Liar, pants on fire: Beautiful Liar.

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7. It is your life and your truth you have to live day to day.

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8. Time for the title song: Springtime for Hitler and Germany.

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9. With this attitude, he freed a country from servitude.

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10. No void here: Not Afraid.

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11. From the creator of two of the most well-known books ever, 1984 and Animal Farm, George Orwell calls out what speaking your truth really is.

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12. Yes, you, the beautiful unique human being you really are: Human.

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13. Naomi Wolf is a feminist author and journalist. Her career in journalism began in 1995 and has included topics such as abortion, the Occupy Wall Street movement, Edward Snowden and ISIS. She has written for media outlets such as The NationThe New RepublicThe Guardian and The Huffington Post.

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14. From the 18th Century comes insight into how difficult it is to speak your truth in today’s society given the instant gratification society we exist in today: It Wasn’t Easy to Be Happy For You.

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15. And from the worlds most famous philosopher, Ms Unknown comes to our final lesson and the reason you should always speak your truth.

Live authentically and cherish each precious moment of your journey, Because when you finally arrive at your desired destination, I guarantee you, another journey will begin. At least that is what I have found on my journey of spreading my ethos, Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included across the planet.

The playlist today has some of the biggies in it. In Australia, there is no one bigger than John Farnham. My unknown artist for this list is Cryptic Wisdom. Then possibly the two biggest pop diva’s combine, Beyonce and Shakira. The title song is next, Then across to America for our final songs from Eminem, Rag “N Bone Man and the Lumineers: Springtime for Hitler and Germany

Remember you can sign up to receive these blogs on my home page: until we meet again, my dear friends.

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Smile at Strangers, We’re In This Together!!!


I have had a list on my kitchen wall called Key Statements, I don’t know why or when I wrote it, but here it is:

Don’t let an opportunity go by that that you can make a difference in.

Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included.

Don’t pull back from opportunities to explore the sexual world.

Don’t withhold your feelings for another, it will fester.

Ask, Ask, Ask.

Walk like the value is surging through your body.

I will release my empathic abilities to heal others.

I am a key member of the conscious Melbourne tribe.

Working on each of them at different levels at the moment, here are some things I could do to achieve them sooner:

  1. Take care of myself – Your relationship is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have.
  2. Do what I know is right, for ME – Don’t be scared to walk alone, and don’t be scared to like it.
  3. Follow my own unique path – Every new day is a chance to change your life.
  4. Lock myself away from the world and work on your goals – Dream big dreams, but realize that short term, realistic goals are the key to success.
  5. Adjust my goals and dreams as life changes – don’t forget that sometimes taking a positive step forward requires you to slightly adjust your dreams, or plan new ones – it’s OK to change your mind or have more than one dream.
  6. Forgive those who have wronged me – Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong and wise.
  7. Show everyone my love and kindness – If you are reserving your love only for those who you have decided are worthy of it – it may come as no surprise that is not loving, it is judgement.
  8. Stand up for others, even if it’s the unpopular thing to do – Sometimes you will say something really small and simple, but it will fit right into an empty space in someone’s heart.
  9. Fight through my failures – When I am feeling down or dealing with failure, don’t be ashamed.
  10. Keep my head held high and keep on smiling – Every day of your life is a page of your history.  The only time I run out of chances is when I stop taking them.

So what have people on the planet said about energy and how they use it, here are a few of my favourites:

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1. You have the opportunity to make it a better day for each person you come across, do that.

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2. Your first gut feeling is often incredibly accurate, trust it: Gut Feeling.

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3. You are your own personal lifesaver.

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4. Using the principles he teaches, T. Harv Eker went from zero to millionaire in only 2 1/2 years! He combines a unique brand of ‘street-smarts with heart’.

Eker’s high-energy, ‘cut-to-the-chase’ style keeps his audience spellbound. T. Harv Eker’s motto is “talk is cheap” and his unique ability is getting people to take “action” in the real world to produce real success: Can’t Stop The Feeling.

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5. What opus are you composing for your life?

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6. I love Prince Ea, check out his Youtube videos: Love Yourself.

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7. And then we have Oprah’s take on it.

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8. Heads or Tails: Love Myself.

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9. As can we, be an eagle in your life.

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10. And a piece of wisdom from the Man In Black: Your Own Personal Jesus.

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11. All you need is LOVE.

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12. A powerful line of study that will resolve much in your life: Energy.

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13. Shadow and Light, they travel together.

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14. The Chinese are great at profound proverbs: Winds of Change.

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15. And for our final lesson, this intriguing offering from Osho.

There are few joys in life that equal a good conversation, a good read, a good walk, a good hug, a good smile, or a good friend. As you empower your energy toy will have more and more opportunity to do this. One of my key statement is my ethos for the planet: Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included, as I increase my energy it eventual occurrence comes closer and closer.

The playlist today has spoken word from Prince Ea, one of my faves. We start with Ella Mai and then bop along with Justin Timberlake. Prince Ea is next followed by pop diva Hailee Steinfeld. Then we finish with three male vocals: Johny Cash, Drake and Vance Joy: Smile at Strangers, We’re In This Together!!!

Until we meet again, my dear friends. Remember you can request these blogs in your inbox om the main page of I am an Interculturalist.

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Your job is not to be Perfect!!!


I went to my friends’ Australian citizenship ceremony on Australia day on Sunday. It a nice thing to do but it may me ponder as to why you have to say out loud I will uphold and obey the laws of the land. My friend said she crossed her fingers at this line. Why I pondered it is what if the laws of the land go against what is in your heart and soul and how boring would it be if every person in a country held the same value?

What should we care about as a human resident of our planet? Here is a list of some worthwhile things:

1. Start caring about your own happiness – It’s important to make people happy, but you have to start with yourself.

2. Start caring about your goals and dreams – If you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind goes when it wanders. 

3. Start caring about how you invest your time every day – There might not be a tomorrow, not for everyone.

4. Start caring about how you think and what you think about – In your quiet moments, what do you think about?

5. Start caring about how you treat yourself – Your relationship with yourself is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have.

6. Start caring about how you treat others – Live so that when the people around you think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.

7. Start caring about how others treat you – Choose your relationships wisely.

8. Start caring about your health – Exercise to be fit, not skinny.

9. Start caring about your education and personal growth – Achieving higher consciousness comes from your commitment to personal growth.

10. Start caring about doing the BEST you can – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.

11. Start caring about all the wonderful things you have right now – Learn to appreciate the things you have before time forces you to appreciate the things you once had.

12. Start caring about this moment we call ‘life’ – Our whole life leads up to each new moment. Each moment is priceless.

So what have we said about being a human being residing on this planet of ours over time, here are a few of my favourite things:

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1. This arises when we start listening to and believing that other peoples opinions are more important than our own.

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2. To me, George Orwell wrote one of the great odes to the danger of perfection, 1984: I’m Not Perfect, But I’m Perfect for You.

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3. Anthony Robbins is an American author, life coach, and philanthropist. Robbins has worked on an individual basis with Bill Clinton, Justin Tuck, Wayne Gretzky, Serena Williams, Hugh Jackman, and Pitbull, quite a diverse group of individual human beings.

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4. The whole spiel from Tony: I Learnt from the Best.

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5. Humane: A humane person is one who shows great compassion and caring for others, including animals, and who tries whenever possible to alleviate another’s suffering. The idea of being humane is linked to a higher level of a person’s character:

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6. Shruti is either a data scientist or a Bollywood actress, which one do you think said this: Ego.

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7. Seven billion of us and counting.

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8. Artist Alex has come up with some sage wisdom here: Sincerity is Scary.

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9. An American stand up comic, Amy was nominated for two Grammy Awards, for Best Comedy Album for Amy Schumer: Live at the Apollo and Best Spoken Word Album for The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo

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10. And then sometimes we need a break, so just be an owl: Night Owl.

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11. And your task for your life is…

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12. Raised in small-town America, Wright’s mother died when he was six days old. His father later married a much younger woman, Gertrude:  “Gertrude was closer to my age than to my father’s”. Gertrude hated small-town life, but got along famously with Wright, as they shared many of the same childish tastes (both loved games, movies, and ice cream): Pure Imagination.

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13. Interesting website page name: Stop the Pain now, an interesting take on humanness.

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14. J. R. Rowling, creator of the Harry Potter empire stated she chose the name Dumbledore, which is a dialectal word for “bumblebee”, because of Dumbledore’s love of music: she imagined him walking around “humming to himself a lot”: The Humming.

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15. And for our final lesson, we hear from Brene Brown, who, before her fame researched shame for several decades.

Life is about taking chances. It’s about doing something you initially thought you could never do. It’s about being a little bit crazy, following your heart, being human and not worrying about every detail of what everyone else thinks. And above all. it’s about learning to love who you are and what you have, all of your humanness.

The playlist bounces all over the place today, from Beyonce to Gene Wilder. We begin with three divas: Grace Jones, Whitney Houston and Beyonce. My unknown offering is next, The 1975. Then across to England with Gerry Rafferty, dropping into Hollywood next with Gene Wilder before completing with Enya: Your Job is Not to Be Perfect!!!

If we had to wait until everyone was perfect my dream and goal of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included being the world paradigm would seem a long way off in our humanistic world.

Remember you can get these blogs in your inbox by signing up on the right-hand side of my main page at I am an Interculturalist. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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She Births New Beginnings!!!


Crewed on an event called Embody your Full Power as a Man last night. It’s an introduction to a body of work called Dancing Eros for Men. Surprisingly you do not journey with your male archetypes but with those of the sacred feminine: The archetypes are the Maiden, the Wild Woman, the Priestess, the Erotic Mother and the Slut and they live in all of us in their own unique way: Dancing Eros.

I began the journey in June 2018 with some trepidation as I looked out over the group of men gathered in the room the first night as to what a slightly over the hill 63-year-old would get out of such a program and would I have to dance like a slut in front of 20 other men, not really my bag. This what I wrote when requested to do a testimonial for the intro last night: The intimacy I created with the group of men I journeyed with transmuted to everyone in my life: Lovers, Brothers, Sisters, Parents, Workmates, Strangers in the Streets, see you at the intro. It was like the spirit of humanity sat in that room with me over the eight nights and days we spent together.

My friend Marc Chernoff has created a list which sums up pretty well what I got out of it:

A Silhouette of a human being stands before you. Perhaps a friend. Perhaps a lover. Perhaps a perfect stranger. They need you to connect with them. They need you to share this moment.

They need you to:

1. They need you to smile without hesitation.

2. Give without expectation.

3. Comfort without lying.

4. Guide without misleading.

5. Forgive without resentment.

6. Rest without judgement.

7. Notice without critiquing.

8. Appreciate without comparing.

9. Listen without interruption.

10. Question without objection.

11. Challenge without mocking.

12. Consider without doubting.

13. Discuss without criticizing.

So what have we said about our sacred feminine spirit over the centuries, here are some of the ways we expressed it:

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1. As children, we rely on what our heart says to us to be in the world, as our brain kicks in, we forget the purity of this.

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2. Just Man up is such a demeaning tool to dissect our full personality: On a Roll.

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3. You need to do the work.

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4. CARLOS ANDRÉS GÓMEZ is a Colombian American poet, speaker, actor, and author of Hijito, selected by Eduardo C. Corral as the winner of the 2018 Broken River Prize and a #1 SPD bestseller, and the memoir Man Up: Reimagining Modern Manhood, released by Penguin Random House: We’ve Only Just Begun.

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5. To take on a transformational shift like Dancing Eros, you need a fair bit of this.

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6. We need to have them in a healthy balance: Both Sides Now.

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7. From the 18th Century. Charlotte Brontë was an English novelist and poet, the eldest of the three Brontë sisters who survived into adulthood and whose novels became classics of English literature.

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8. Values can be buried with you and remembered, Ferrari’s can’t: I Gotta Feeling.

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9. French-born fashionista Rykiel was also a writer. She wrote several books about fashion, a collection of children’s stories, magazine columns and an epistolary novel with Régine Desforges. Her first book Et Je La Voudrais Nue (I Would Like Her Naked) was published in 1979. In 2012, she co-authored N’oubliez pas que je joue (Don’t forget it’s a game) with journalist Judith Perrignon. 

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10. This is why it was an honour to be part of the crew who gave the opportunity to 50 men to transform their lives: The Power of Love.

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11. Time to walk the Inner path.

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12. You can dance if you want to, It’s time: I Wanna Dance with Somebody.

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13. Or that suffering may take you to a Dancing Eros for Men intro in Collingwood.

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14. Listening deeply is part of the deal: Listen to The Earth.

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15. What others would you add?

In the end, what all people want deep down is the need for you to be uniquely you – just the way you are, and they need you to respect them – just the way they are.  This so fits in with my world ethos of Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included.

The playlist contains some of the classic female voices of all time: Unknown pop diva Ashley O begins the journey. Karen Carpenter and Joni Mitchell are the first of our female vocal legends. We return to this century with The Black Eyed Peas before being entranced by Celine Dion and Whitney Houston. We finish with some beats from Listen to the Earth: She Births New Beginnings.

Remember to sign up to receive these blogs in your inbox on the righthand side of my homepage at http://www.rodwill1707.com. Until we meet again, my dear friends.

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It’s About Breaking Down The Walls


I am starting to get a lot of information in my Facebook news feed as to what makes a man a real man, I was in my local library the other day when I saw the updated version of Steve Biddulph’s visionary book Manhood first released in 1998, now called the New Manhood: Love, Freedom, Spirit and the New Masculinity and re-released in 2015. I discovered a review of the book which sums how I see the situation, written by a phycologist named Katja:

Just reading the first ten pages of this book will probably be enough to leave you in no doubt – we in the Western world have a serious problem with men. Lonely, frustrated, confused, unhappy men. Men who can’t express their emotions and either numb them or channel them in negative and violent ways towards women, children, and other men. Men whose identities are tied up in their careers, because they never learned that there were any other options. Men whose fathers were authoritarian, cold, distant, abusive, or absent, and who are perpetuating those same patterns in their own families. Particularly affecting is the section in which Biddulph explores where we as a society got our modern conception of “manliness” – and where, frankly, it all started to go wrong. If this book impresses upon you one message, it is that our concept of manhood has become warped, constricted, deranged – and is in desperate need of re-evaluation. The fact that this is just as much the case as 20 years ago when it was written is extremely worrying. Biddulph doesn’t mince words – he cuts straight to the point and tells it like it is, succinctly but deeply exploring the problems of modern manhood, with a writing style that is refreshing and at times devastatingly emotional. So much so that the friend who lent it to me said that it made him cry – and if you think there’s anything wrong with that, then this book is for you in particular! Here is a link to the book: The New Manhood.

All over the world movements are arising to shift this, in my hometown, Melbourne we have one-day events called Isle of Men and a three-day retreat called Menergy, they are for men to attend to become a better man for themselves, their partners, their children, their families and their friends. So what has the world said about masculinity over the years, let’s take that journey:

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1. Withholding causes emotional and physical pain on an ongoing basis.

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2. Little Boxes, Little Boxes all in a row: Mask Off.

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3. What one could call living a complete life, not ignoring the hard parts.

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4. Wrong-way, go back: A Woman’s Worth.

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5. Boom!!!

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6. The shadow and the light, Its all part of the deal: Shadow of The Day.

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7. If this irritates you, its time to begin the journey.

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8. The journey from the mind to the heart and back again – a great start: Jar of Hearts.

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9. I am 65, I only learnt this in my last five years, it is very freeing.

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10. Both M and F words, but they have totally different meanings and distinctions attached to them: Breaking Free.

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11. Repeat after me, It is not given to you.

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12. The film industry has a lot to answer for: Gangsta’s Paradise.

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13. Because I can.

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14. Fuck, this is good: In My Feelings.

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15. And for our final lesson in masculinity, who is the greatest victim, time to go and look in your mirror.

Each chapter has a quote at the beginning, I thought I would finish with a few:

You and your father: Oh will you never return to see, your bruised and battered sons? Oh, I would, I would, if welcome I were for they loathe me everyone – Traditional Folk Song.

Real Sex: Slowly, Slowly in bed with a woman, I am learning to be human – Jesse Kornbluth

From Boy to Man: Between childhood, boyhood, adolescence and manhood there should be sharp lines drawn with tests, feats, rites, stories, songs and judgements – Jim Morrison.

You would think a playlist about masculinity would be all men lamenting on the subject, not so. There is quite a bit of rap though. We begin with Future who is followed by Alicia Keys. Linkin Park gets quite dark next then Christina Perri and Ruby Rose have their say. Back to rap to finish with Coolio and Drake: It’s about breaking down the Walls.

In the steps forward I have seen in the men’s movement in my country I hold great hope for my ethos: Love and Respect for All, Everyone Included. Until we meet again my dear friends.

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From Where We Are, There Is Always a Pathway to Love!!!


So, its the day after the Warriors of Love retreat and a feel many kilos of dross lighter. We looked at the power of choice in quite a rigorous and at time lighthearted way. I picked up a new nickname to go along with Tiny Tim and DF, I have to use the initials as the whole name and story behind it would not pass #Metoo guidelines these days. The latest addition is Naughty Boy. Here is some info about the Warriors of Love: Enter the Portal.

We worked with the distinctions The Loop and As it Is and What I Choose. I struggled with this for quite a time as the concept there are always consequences after making a choice got in the way. I got it in the end though.

So how has humanity worded choice over the centuries, let’s take that journey:

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  1. This quote is talking to you , not your circumstances.

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2. This is an ongoing inquiry that ends when they throw the dirt on your coffin: The Path to Wisdom.

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3. Two words, great list.

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4. All hail Queen Oprah: Every Sperm Is Sacred.

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5. Probably been replaced with the word journalling these days.

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6. Trust the gut feeling and get the fuck out of there: Diamonds.

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7. Luckily for me, my siblings are amongst my dearest friends, are yours?

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8. What if you daily choices were that free: How Far I’ll Go.

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9. Your awesomely wonderful life isn’t choosing, your heart-space is.

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10. Blogger turned New York Times best-selling author and speaker Mandy Hale is the creator of the social media movement, “The Single Woman.” With a heart to inspire single women to live their best lives and to never, ever settle, Mandy cuts to the heart of the matter with her inspirational, straight-talking, witty, and often wildly humorous take on life and love. Mandy’s message reaches literally millions of women across the world every day through her blog, books, and social media platforms: I am Woman.

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11. I found this one on consequences.

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12. How many day and moments do you choose this: Can’t Stop The Feeling.

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13. When was that again, Today?

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14. Feeling life instead of just attending it, that would be novel: Freedom.

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15. And for your final lesson, realise that where you choices take you is your own unique journey, the one meant for you.

We will finish with one of my friend Marc Chernoff’s lists, Ten Timeless Lessons/Choices from a Life Well Lived:

  1. Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned, worn, or consumed.
  2. Be a student of life every day.
  3. Experience is the best teacher.
  4. Your choices, your actions, your life.
  5. No one is “too busy” It’s all about priorities.
  6. Be patient and tough. Someday this pain will be useful to you.
  7. It’s usually better to be kind than be right.
  8. You can become a . magnet for good things by wishing everybody well.
  9. Only you are in charge of your attitude.
  10. Satisfaction is not always the fulfilment of what you want.

I have taken up the practice of including a relative unknown song on the playlist. Its begins todays and is by Mr. 48 Alec Verkuilen.  The next track speaks to the light side of the weekend and is by the Monty Python crew. Then back to my beloved pop divas with a number by Rihanna. A track from a musical follows from Auli’i Cravalho. An ode to women from Jordin Sparks is before the penultimate track by Justin Timberlake and we finish with the iconic Beyonce: From Where We Are, There is Always a Pathway To Love.

Remember to sign up to the email miss so you don’t miss out on my latest blogs. Each is based in Love and Respect for All, Everybody Included:

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